“I Wanna Feel Sunlight on My Face”

Posted on September 26, 2016 by Double K

bono

I’m no expert on death.  I know why it happens.  I’ve experienced it and you have too.  I accept it and I know it’s a part of life.  I know that each of us will come face to face with our own mortality some day, and I know God has a plan for us all.  I know that we don’t always understand it.  I’m 45 and I still question why it happens to certain people and the timing of it all.  I think the questioning is just part of what makes us human though.

Days and weeks and months pass by and we may not notice it, but then it touches you or I.  A co-worker’s friend has a two year old that drowns.  A famous baseball pitcher only 24 passes away in a boating accident.  And then one Sunday you notice a lot of cars at a neighbor’s house all day.  You know that there is either a fun gathering or something bad has happened.  You hope for the former, but you’re not surprised when it’s the latter.  Our neighbor directly across the street from us had a 17 year old senior in high school with seemingly endless potential that perished in a one car accident on Saturday night.

His name is Kyler Williams and he was an all-state wide receiver for the Springdale High School football team with college scholarship offers.  I didn’t know Kyler, and maybe that’s what also bothers me today.  I wish I had.  I met him once when his mom moved into the house across from us years ago.  I wish I could recall a story of something funny he said or something funny he did.  I wish I’d just asked him about football one time or gave him a shout of encouragement.  Maybe the time or circumstance never presented itself.  Am I justifying my lack of engagement?  Maybe.  But maybe sometimes we need to create those moments.  I should have created a moment, a small bond of some sort.  Isn’t that what life is about?  About those small moments, those connections and our relationships?

kwilliams

A gofundme page has been set up to help cover the costs associated with the funeral on Wednesday

I also wish I could say something or do something in Kyler’s memory that would help ease the pain of a mom across the street that must somehow find the strength to go on without him.  Maybe this post in itself is my way of honoring a young man I didn’t know.  My grandma, who just turned 100 this year, has often said that a parent should never have to bury a child no matter how old, and I can’t think of a more true statement.  It makes you question God’s plan.  I know and I accept there is a bigger plan that our human minds cannot begin to comprehend, but it doesn’t mean I can’t question it.  God gave us an innate curiosity, and I think God expects to be questioned, and would be disappointed if we didn’t question social injustices and senseless tragedies.  I questioned one last night while I silently prayed in the coolness of the night for the family across the street.  I know I don’t feel 1/1000th of the pain that family feels today, but I still empathize and I still care.  It’s a tragedy like this that also shines a beauty on what it means to have family and friends.  Cars and vehicles have come and gone and stayed at the house across the street the past 24+ hours and I know that has to provide some comfort.

I’m not sure how Kyler spent time between his father and mother, but I saw him often across the street coming and going probably from football practice.  I knew his car when I saw it in the driveway and it seems like he was always loading or unloading.  The main thing I remember is that when I did see him he was almost always shirtless.  I used to smile to myself because it reminded me of my basketball playing days at Norman High.  Young and athletic, toned and in great physical shape.  I didn’t have an ounce of fat on me and neither did Kyler.  Friday night Kyler scored three touchdowns (just like his number), had 267 yards receiving, and was named player of the game in Springdale’s homecoming win.

He wore number three apparently when he couldn’t wear number one.  But maybe it’s fitting that he wore the number of God’s divine perfection.  My wife and I watched the local news and his auto accident was the headline.  I’ve seen Kyler’s father occasionally across the street dropping off or picking up his children, and he was interviewed by one of the local television stations yesterday.  I found myself impressed and even astounded at his strength, composure and grace less than 24 hours after Kyler’s death.

I also found myself very impressed with Kyler’s faith.  He wasn’t shy about sharing it on social media.  There are others similar tweets, but this one is one of my favorites I ran across on his Twitter feed from last December…

15 Dec 2015

– I went from nothing to something with the help of Jesus Christ

256 retweets319 likes
When I started this post I admitted that I didn’t know Kyler even though he lived right across the street, but after spending some time watching the interviews and reading the articles and viewing the tweets I feel like I know Kyler better and what type of athlete he was and better yet what type of person he was.  I still regret not getting to know him better at some point over the last few years, but I don’t regret a minute of the time I spent researching and writing this post.

“I’ll show you a place high on a desert plain…”

Of course this U2 song was released in 1987 and popular way before Kyler was even born, but part of the beauty of music is that you can find similarities and inspiration across generations and genres.  One of the things that Kyler’s father said in his interview was that he wasn’t worried about Kyler, because he knows where Kyler is.  I hope that gives him peace.  I hope that gives his family some comfort.  Today’s song fills me with a peace and a hope as I listen to Bono sing about a place where income and religion and race have no division.  If Kyler’s dad believes it, then I also believe Kyler is in that place today probably running post routes.  But I also believe he can feel the sunlight on his face in a place “where the streets have no name…”

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 1 Comment

“No Rapper Can Rap Quite Like I Can”

Posted on September 21, 2016 by Double K

“I take a musclebound man and put his face in the sand.” – LL Cool J

Yesterday I was playing in the local Charity Challenge golf scramble at Pinnacle Country Club in Rogers, AR.  One of our foursome was a retiree named Harold Cornett from Russellville, AR, who happened to grow up in New Orleans.  Well my dad was a two-time All-American for the Tulane University Green Wave in New Orleans in the early 60’s.  When I mentioned who my dad was Harold was almost in disbelief.  He and his friends had grown up going to Tulane games and playing basketball on the playgrounds.  He told me that when they played one of them was always pretending to be “Jumpin'” Jim Kerwin.  My dad was a pretty big deal in the hoops scene in New Orleans during that time.

jimmyk

My dad is also a very competitive dad.  He’s still competitive to this day only it’s at the poker table instead of the basketball court or on the golf course.  Back then he possessed a killer jump shot, was a solid rebounder as a 6’2″ guard, and he could knock down a hook shot right-handed or left-handed although he will tell you his younger brother Tommy’s was better (Tommy was actually known as “Captain Hook” during his time at Centenary).  He was a bad man with a ball in his hands.

“And when rap begin then I gotta join in and before my rhyme is over you know I’m a win”

Pretty sure it was the Christmas break of 1988 and I was a senior in high school.  I was at the Lloyd Noble Center after an OU basketball practice.  My dad was in his fifth season as an assistant coach for Billy Tubbs and the OU Sooner basketball team.  He would spend one more season on staff before jumping to join Dana Altman for two seasons at Kansas State. The Sooners had lost to Kansas in the National Championship game earlier in the year, but still had All-Americans Mookie Blaylock and Stacy King leading the way on this ’88-’89 team.

lnc

My dad was 47 at the time, which is just two years older than I am now.  You know the phrase that was even a popular Toby Keith song – “I’m not as good as I once was, but I’m as good once as I ever was.”  Well, this day was fitting of that song for my dad.  I went through a few shooting drills as dad had me shooting 10-15 foot jumpers and then worked a little on my three point shooting and incorporated some full court ball-handling into the drills as well.

“Sparrin’ MC’s and I’m a never get whipped.  When I retire I’ll get worship like an old battleship”

We finished the workout with free throw shooting.  We decided to shoot 100 free throws each to see who the best free throw shooter was.  Would you bet on me, a 17 year old senior in his free throw shooting prime (and former state of Oklahoma Elk Hoop Shoot champ) starting for one of the powerhouse high schools in the state – the Norman High Tigers?  Or, is your money going on the old man – 20 years past his prime as a two-time All-American at Tulane University where he led the SEC in scoring one season, and then spent time as a semi-pro player for the Phillips 66ers AAU team located in Bartlesville, Oklahoma?  Me right?  Whatever.

27091732181_da10db6fe8_o

My dad knocking down free throws at a Phillips 66er reunion many years ago.

Well, I stepped to the line and I was in the zone.  I proceeded to knock down 96 out of 100.  For you math majors, that’s 96%.  That’s better than NBA players shoot during the season!  Only then Toronto point guard Jose Calderon qualified by shooting enough free throws in the 2008-09 season when he hit 151-154 for a 98% clip.  Other than that, not Mark Price, not Steph Curry, not Steve Nash, not even the great Rick Barry and his “granny” shot made 96% for a season.  Sure I was shooting in an empty Lloyd Noble Center, but I also wasn’t even close to a NBA caliber player either.

My dad used to tell his players when he was a coach at Seminole Junior College in Oklahoma from 1980-1984 that if anyone beat him shooting free throws that he would buy them a steak dinner.  I know one thing.  My dad didn’t buy very many steak dinners during that time.  Well, he stepped up to the free throw line and hit his first ten in a row.  Then he made the next ten.  The next ten after that.  Ten more, then ten more again, and before I knew it, he had made 100 in a row!

“I’m the pinnacle that means I reign supreme, and I’m notorious I’ll crush you like a jelly bean”

I’m pretty sure my dad and LL would have got along just fine on the basketball court because of their penchant for talking trash.    Anytime he wanted to really rub it in he would say “it shouldn’t even count if it hits the rim.”  Yeah, I get it, dad.  You’re still a good shooter.  After demoralizing me by making 100 out of 100 I quickly shook it off realizing that I was kind of getting to see what my dad looked like in his prime and urged him to continue.  To this day, I have never seen any footage of my dad playing even though I’ve searched for some.  I’m convinced there is some footage out there, but I just haven’t found it yet.

So he continued shooting.  Ten more in a row.  Then the next ten.  He ended up making 160 in a row before being short on #161.  I guess at some point when you’re 47 your legs might get a little tired.  I don’t know.  I’m not there yet.

One.  Hundred.  Sixty.  In a row.  I’m not sure I could have made 160 layups in a row at anytime during my prime.  Like I said, my dad was a bad man with a ball in his hands… even at the age of 47.  And he still brings back fond memories to guys who are now in their 60’s and 70’s who you might randomly meet on a golf course in Rogers, Arkansas.  As much as it was a thrill for Harold it was even more so for me to play golf with a man who had seen my dad play numerous times in the old Fogelman Arena on the campus of Tulane University.  Harold told me as he was leaving that he couldn’t wait to get home and call all of his old buddies and tell them that he had played golf with “Jumpin'” Jim Kerwin’s son.  Well, I couldn’t wait to call my dad and tell him what a small world we really live in.  My only regret from the day was that my golf game wasn’t as impressive as Harold’s memories of my dad, “Jumpin'” Jim Kerwin.

llbad

Today’s 80’s hit is one of my favorite 80’s raps.  LL Cool J (Ladies Love Cool James) burst onto the scene as braggadocious 17-year-old in 1985 with his “Radio” album, but I really jumped on the LL bandwagon with his 1987 release “Bigger and Deffer.”  The album went platinum three times and was probably best known for the commercially successful rap ballad “I Need Love.”  But, it was “I’m Bad” that hit you right in face when you popped in that cassette.  I wore the cassette out and in particular that song.  I would listen to it religiously on my way up to the Norman High School gym before home games as a way to pump myself up before a basketball game.  Our team used to also play it as we came out of the locker room and onto the floor during my junior season.  We were bad meaning really good.

“I’m the best takin’ out all rookies, so forget Oreos eat Cool J cookies”

Well, here is a then 19-year-old LL with a bad video.  And, by bad, this time I mean bad, not good.  LOL.  LL must have had an IV of caffeine hooked up to him before he shot this thing, because he is hyped up during this video.  This video must have also been an audition tape for his current role as Detective Sam Hanna on “NCIS Los Angeles.”  Check out a jacked up James Todd Smith rescuing his lady all the while telling us “I’m Bad”…

“You want a hit?  Give me an hour plus a pen and a pad!”

Thanks for your time, and go Green Wave.

Sincerely,

the 80’s

 

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“Guess Who Just Got Back Today?”

Posted on September 14, 2016 by Double K

“Them wild-eyed boys that had been away.” – Thin Lizzy

Every August I meet up with old buddies of mine that attended St. Gregory’s College in Shawnee, Oklahoma.  St. Greg’s used to be a small two-year Catholic college.  Now, it’s a small four-year university about 30 miles east of OKC.  Some of these guys have been meeting every year since they were attending St. Gregory’s, some 26 years running!  I have been attending only in the past 10 years or so, and have missed a few of those through the years as well.  I don’t really even remember the first year I attended.  It might have been longer than 10 years ago.  I’d have to look back through Danny Link’s photo albums and see.

stgregs

The entry to St. Gregory’s University

We usually gather at a designated spot near Lake Texoma (a trailer park in Alberta Creek for many years when I first started coming, and now at various rent houses close by).  2015 was the only non-Lake Texoma to my knowledge.  We stayed at a house owned by Trey Riley and his brother at Grand Lake in the NE corner of Oklahoma (a much closer drive for me in NW Arkansas).  There are usually somewhere between 10-20 guys that show up every year and most of the ones that show up graduated between 1990-1992.

“Man, I still think them cats are crazy.”

It’s so great to see these guys every year.  We’re a year older, some of us a little heavier, some of us a little grayer, some of us a little softer than the year before.  Some of us snore a little louder (Jay).  I love you brother!  Remember, – the love is why I didn’t kill you in your sleep!  We catch up on each others’ lives, and then it’s the same stories that have been told for 25 years.  There are a few less beers drank and the bed-time hour seems to get earlier and earlier every year, but the camaraderie never changes.  The love that we have for each other is reconfirmed during these 2-3 days.

Some six years ago in 2010 we lost one of our brothers, Doug Taylor, to complications following a surgery.  He was one of the most unique of all.  Though he didn’t always attend every one, I didn’t even consider the possibility of Lake Texoma weekends without him at the time.  He was so full of life and just a month shy of his 39th birthday.  I was sure he would be able to join us at many more Lake Texoma weekends to come, but as we are all too-often reminded – Doug’s healing and recovery weren’t in God’s plan for a reason that we’ll never fully understand in this lifetime.  There is nothing like the death of a peer to hit you with a quick reality check of your own life.  After my morning workout in my garage the day after he died, I finished it with a quick (but poor) rendition of Muhammad Ali shadow boxing in honor of Doug, because he was a huge Ali fan.  I thought of Doug again when Ali died earlier this year.  I think of Doug when I see Facebook posts by some of his friends from Noble, Oklahoma where Doug attended high school.  I see pictures of Doug when I rummage through my St. Greg’s stuff in my attic, and I think of Doug at every Lake Texoma event.  We all do.

kkdoug

Doug and I in a SGC Cavaliers team photo, fall of 1990.  

He was a responsible father and husband by this time in 2010 with a job as superintendent of the Gage public school system in western Oklahoma.  But when you are college friends with someone you know them on a different level.  You know them as a kind, funny and sometimes impetuous late teen, early 20-something trying to figure out who they are and what part they will play in their adult life.  Most of us knew Doug as a smart dude and as a friend that didn’t shy away from a good time in college.  Everyone of us has a Doug Taylor story.  Doug loved sports (particularly basketball), music, and knew way more random facts than you and I combined.  He loved the game show “Jeopardy!” and you stood no chance against him.

I say that all about Doug not only to remember him but to also preface the fact that through the years we have gathered up money from many of us to invest in a college fund for his son, Drew.  We have also renamed our golf round on Friday, The Doug Taylor Memorial Golf Tournament, with a trophy of Doug going to the outstanding player of the day.  That person gets to keep it for a year and ink their name into history on the back of it.  I had the privilege of winning it in 2015 and proudly displayed it in my office at work all year.

stgregsdoug

Top: 2016’s winning team:  (l-r) Chad McKee, Billy Bean, Doug Taylor Memorial MVP Joe Meziere, and myself.  Bottom:  (l-r) Myself, Joe, Miguel Figueredo, and Doug Taylor circa 1990-91 at St. Greg’s

We were there for each other during this time.  We’ve seen each other through other illness and losses of friends and family members.  We’ve had divorces and promotions and job losses.  We’ve celebrated the highs with each other and helped each other through the lows.

Just like any large group we have a diverse group of men vocationally – doctors, educators, lawyers, representatives in the financial industry, electronics, sales, etc.  That is part of the uniqueness of our group and what makes it fun and entertaining every year.  But above all is the commonality we all have of one place and of one period in time.

sguwsumner

The rest of this year’s 2016 crew.  l-r  Trey Riley, Jay Carr, Tony Van Eck, Steve Khoury, Billy Bean, longtime SGU coach/AD Don Sumner, Bryndon Manzer, Kyle Kuhns, and Danny Link

I veered out of the 80’s decade for this 1976 song today because it reminds me of Doug (there are actually numerous songs that do).  Each of my two years at St. Greg’s I put together a video (VHS style) of our year from all of the footage I had on my video camera.  It was a tedious and sometimes frustrating process.  I had very basic equipment – two VCR’s hooked up together and a music player to dub music in.

camcorder

We still have this same camcorder at my parents’ house in Norman, OK.

At the beginning of the 1990-91 school year, Doug suggested this song as an appropriate intro to our year-end video our sophomore year, and I thought the song was perfect so I used it to begin the video.  Also, if you’re out there and you happen to have an old VHS tape of that video, I’d love to have it because my master copy was misplaced many many years ago!  I keep holding hope that a copy will show up magically one day.

Anyway, it’s the biggest hit by the Irish rock band, Thin Lizzy.  From 1976…

“The boys are back in town.  The boys are back in town.  The boys are back.  The boys are back.”

Thanks for reading.

Sincerely,

the 80’s / late 70’s / early 90’s

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

“I’ll Be Alone”

Posted on September 10, 2016 by Double K

“Dancing, you know it baby” – Simple Minds

simpleminds

My favorite sitcom these days begins their episodes with the popular phrase “it was 1980-something” and that show, of course, is the popular ABC show “The Goldbergs.”  I’ll be honest, the first one or two episodes I wasn’t sold.  I wanted a little more “Wonder Years,” but instead got more “Roseanne.”  I hated the screaming at each other and thought why do I have to see Murray drop his pants and walk around in his tightie-whities?  I kind of wrote the show off and didn’t think much more about it until season two came and I gave it another chance.

Thankfully, the show has really grown on me, and has made its own way in the difficult, ever-changing landscape of network television.  While I was hoping for another “Wonder Years,” I’m glad I didn’t get that, because this show has its’ own uniqueness, and does an awesome job of capturing all of the hilarious fads and fashions of the 80’s.  The real-life footage that the real Adam Goldberg throws in at the end of most of the episodes just helps with authenticity of the show.

I have to say that I am pumped after seeing previews for the first episode of season four.  “The Goldbergs” are paying tribute to one of the greatest movies of the 80’s and of all-time, in my opinion – “The Breakfast Club”

John Hughes classic about five students forced to spend all day Saturday in detention is genius thanks to its well-written script and casting of Judd Nelson (Bender; this part almost went to John Cusack), Molly Ringwold (Claire), Emilio Estevez (Andy), Ally Sheedy (Allison), Michael Anthony Hall (Brian), and Paul Gleason as Principal Richard “Dick” Vernon – “Don’t mess with the bull young man.  You’ll get the horns.”

o-breakfast-club-570

Pretty sure I would have made a solid sixth member of this crew back in 1985.

“Tell me your troubles and doubts.”

Well it wasn’t 1980-something, but instead it was February 15, 1985 and I was a skinny, awkward 13 year old 8th grader at Whittier Middle School in Norman, Oklahoma, when “The Breakfast Club” was released in theaters.

whittier

Whittier Middle School when it used to be “underground” back in 1985

The movie was the first R-rated movie I ever snuck into.  Heck, I was almost 14 and practically an adult!  The movie was playing at the old Village 6 Cinema in the Brookhaven Village (it’s now a swanky Starbuck’s where I get my middle-aged over-priced $5 lattes when I’m in town visiting my parents).

Just like any sneaky teenager, you could buy a ticket as you walked in the front doors for one show and then when no one was paying attention you could easily slip into the theater of the show you wanted.  I have no idea what ticket I bought that night (it might have been “Turk 182!” – how about that for a movie you’ve long forgotten about or maybe have never seen!), but my best friend Barry and I met our 8th grade girlfriends there and snuck into together.

It was all so rebellious sneaking into a R rated movie full of adult language and drug use!  I’m pretty sure I even held hands with my girlfriend at the time or possibly even wrapped my arm around her.

“Will you recognize me?  Call my name or walk on by?”

Part of the beauty of the movie is the simplicity of it all.  It’s not really outdated because technology (think phones or computers) was not prominent in the movie and high schools haven’t changed much in the last 30 years.  They still have libraries and lockers and basketball gyms.  And most of all, high schools still have cliques, and relationships between and within those cliques.  And there will always be teenagers filling those hallways and classrooms yearning to be understood during an uncertain and awkward time in their lives.

The late, great John Hughes did a solid job of presenting someone most any teenager can still relate to. Thirty years later there are still jocks and nerds and preppies and rebels and strange outcasts at every school.  There are boyfriends and girlfriends that seem like they will last forever and there are those relationships that won’t last two weeks.  There are earrings to exchange.  There are letterman jackets to keep your girlfriend warm, and there are still smart-mouth know-it-alls ready to challenge authority with a world full of possibilities ahead.

For years I’ve had this dream of dressing up on Halloween like Bender and then finding a field goal post to take a picture next to.  I haven’t found the correct wardrobe yet, but when I do, you’ll see the coolest grey-headed 40 something posing with his fist in the air while one of the great songs of the 80’s plays in the background.

Needless to say, I’m anxious to see little Adam Goldberg pull this off when “The Goldbergs” season four premieres on Wednesday, September 21.

goldbergs

“Rain keeps falling.  Rain keeps falling.  Down, down, down, down.”

“The Breakfast Club” also features one of my top five 80’s songs.  I don’t ever turn the station if it comes on.

Reportedly, Simple Minds lead singer Jim Kerr hated the mess that was created for the shooting of this music video, and was none too happy about it during shooting.  Irregardless, the video is still a timeless piece for me.  So, let’s all shout it out… “Hey! hey! hey! hey!”

“Don’t You Forget About Me”

Dear Reader,

I accept the fact that I had to spend nearly a whole week writing this post so there’d be something new on here and would cause you to spend a good two to three minutes reading it.  But I think you’re crazy to expect me to define this blog.  You visit and read this blog as you see it.  In the simplest of terms.  The most convenient definitions.  But what I’ve found is this blog is sometimes funny…

and sometimes nostalgic…

and sometimes thought-provoking…

and sometimes sad…

and sometimes just strange.

I hope this answers your question (that you probably didn’t have).

sincerely (yours),

the 80’s

KKBreakfastclub

Your forty-something author

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , | 1 Comment

“Ain’t Nobody”

Posted on September 4, 2016 by Double K

“loves me better” – Chaka Khan

Today is my wife’s birthday and this post is dedicated to her.

Rebe

Recently, Stacy (a teller who works at my bank) met my wife for the first time and said “Kyle, I met your wife today, and she is so beautiful!”  I automatically replied “Thank you.  Yes, she is.”  Shortly after I thought why am I taking thanks for her beauty?  I didn’t have anything to do with it!  Stacy, of course, was referring to her outward appearance.  I wasn’t the one that brushed her hair or applied her makeup.  I didn’t choose her wardrobe that day or decide what shade of lipstick to use.  It’s funny how we sometimes automatically and unintentionally take credit for things that are way beyond our control or our creation.

rebenature

I love this photo of her at Mount Magazine a few years ago.

My wife sometimes asks me questions about our marriage or our relationship and what I think about certain things be they pertaining to our communication or our closeness or our family.  Sometimes I have good answers.  Sometimes I don’t.  Sometimes I don’t have an answer and sometimes I think I have good answers, but they’re not.  Navigating the marriage waters is not always easy.  My best man at our wedding, Barry Blanton, made a toast similar to navigating waters and marriage.  I don’t remember the exact words, but if you’re married or have been married you know what I’m talking about.  There are times of calm, clear, smooth sailing, and then there are times when the waves are crashing down on your pathetic little boat and you think you’re going to drown in a sea of marriage complicatedness.  Not sure if that’s even a word, but I’m using it, because that’s the best way I can describe it.

But, here’s what I realized years ago and it’s what I cling to during times of rough waters – marriage is no different than life itself.  It’s not this “thing” that fits perfectly into its’ perfect little box that we can show off to our friends and neighbors at parties or on social media.  Marriage is an ever-evolving form of life unto itself.  Marriage is hard work.  I didn’t say it is just hard.  I said it is hard work.  It’s not for the whimsical or faint of heart.  It’s not a 50/50 proposition.  It’s a 100%/100% proposition.  If you think it’s supposed to be fair or equitable all of the time, you better think again, because it’s not most of the time.

But, marriage is also very rewarding.  There can be agonizing lows, but there can also be indescribable highs.  It’s a thrill ride like no other that you have to choose to stay on day after day even when you feel like getting off, and there will be days where you or her or both of you feel like getting off.  Instead, you push forward because you know it’s worth it.  This post is not meant to demean or demoralize those that have been married and been through divorce.  In fact those of you who have been through previous marriages know better than most how hard marriage can be.

midtownplaz

The Midtown Plaza in Norman, OK where we first met.

“At first you put your arms around me.  Then you put your charms around me.”

I met my wife sometime in the late fall/early winter of 1995 after I decided to join Barry as he opened up BNK Financial Services, which was primarily a mortgage company, in the Midtown Plaza in downtown Norman.  Our office was on the first floor across the hall from a beauty salon called “Ebony & Ivory” where my wife was working at the time.  She was this beautiful redhead who was also a student at OSU-OKC working towards a degree in Landscape Architecture.  I proposed to her in the entryway of that building on a warm day in late July 1998.  Through the years I’ve often told people that she “chased me shamelessly until I gave in.”  That’s not acurate nor true, but it provides a laugh when telling our story.

“Makes me happy.  Makes me feel this way.”

We’ve been married 17+ years and my wife still gets embarrassed I think when I tell her that she’s beautiful.  I think she doesn’t believe me sometimes.  I think she still occasionally sees the young, awkward teenage Rebekah in her mind, and not the beautiful strong woman she turned into.  It’s hard to find words to describe her that don’t sound like a cliché, but truly as beautiful as she is on the outside, she is even better on the inside, and that’s what is really important.  The book of Proverbs tells us that “… beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.”  My wife is anything but a cliche’ though, and she is a Godly woman and deserves to be praised.  She has an incredible heart for people and has an encouraging way with Godly advice.  She’s a wonderful mother and friend to our daughter.  There have been way more conversations between those two that I have happily avoided because of subject content.  Come on dads, you know what I’m talking about!  I could have those conversations if I had to, but they are much more real and relevant with Rebekah.

rebe1

She also has the blessing of a tender heart.  She’s a woman with compassion and love for so many, but can easily be hurt when it’s not reciprocated or turns out to be false friendship.  She is strong where I am weak and Rebekah fills a need in this world.  More importantly to me, she fills a need in my heart and a need in Caroline’s heart, and that’s what she really cares about the most anyway.

Last year just before her birthday (it was a “big” one), I purchased her a red Mini Cooper as a present.  It’s a vehicle she talked about wanting for years.  She has this fascinating love for British things like their accents, all things “Doctor Who,” all things Princess Diana, and of course, Mini Coopers.  This one was even the right color and has the cool racing stripes on the hood.

rebecar

Rebekah and her Mini that she affectionately named “Winnie” on her license plate.  If you loved “The Wonder Years” growing up then you have to appreciate that!

There’s not much topping a vehicle for your birthday so this year I wanted to give her something more personal.  Something she values more than materialistic gifts.

For the better part of a year she has led a women’s study group.  They’re currently reading and studying a book written by Danny Silk.  Sometimes I think my wife is secretly on Danny’s payroll because of the sheer number of  mentions that Mr. Silk and his book “Keep Your Love On!” has received in Rebekah’s sphere of influence.  I’ve heard her many times with words of encouragement or gentle instruction and the conversation usually begins with “I’m reading this book called ‘Keep Your Love On!’…”

kylokk

My wife is single-handedly pushing this book up the bestseller lists.

I mention this study group and book because Rebekah has also tried to get me to read it and so far I’ve read two chapters, but that was almost two months ago.  I’ve always had another book or something else I’d rather be doing as an excuse.  So, for her birthday I purchased the book (the actual physical book) AND the workbook and both should be to me via UPS by Tuesday.  My pledge is to begin reading and studying with the group when she begins anew in about two weeks.  As much as she loves the car, this pledge is probably more meaningful and personal to her.  Expensive gifts are nice, but sometimes the thought and execution of something more personal is even better.

chaka

The song “Ain’t Nobody” by the group Rufus & Chaka Khan was released in late 1983 and hit #1 on the U.S. R&B charts and topped out at #22 on the U.S. Billboard Hot 100.  It’s one of her signature songs and I chose it today on this post for a several reasons.

One, it’s featured in the 2003 romantic comedy “Bringing Down the House” starring Steve Martin and Queen Latifah.  Even though it wasn’t Khan’s version (Kelly Price sang it for the movie soundtrack), the song reminds us both of a movie we love watching (check it out if you haven’t seen it).  Secondly, watching the video you just sense the presence of a strong, beautiful woman who knows herself and knows what she wants in life, and that reminds me so much of Rebekah.  Thirdly, this is my favorite Chaka Khan song because she just blows it out in this song – I just love her voice and the rhythm of this song.  My wife may not be able to hit some of Chaka’s notes (heck, Chaka probably can’t hit some of those notes 33 years after release), but she has a great singing voice as well after spending many years singing in church choirs and possesses a little of that soulful feeling you get listening to this song.

Happy birthday to my babe.  I hope you sing this next line, and smile that sweet smile of yours…

“Ain’t nobody loves me better than you…”

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , | 1 Comment

Life is Just a Fantasy (football league)

Posted on August 29, 2016 by Double K

“Can you live this fantasy life?” – Aldo Nova

This may not be exactly what Aldo Nova had in mind, but last Sunday marked the 21st annual draft in the B&K fantasy football league.  Our league is made up of approximately 20 men (some teams have “co-owners”) and one bold woman (props to Jen (Hopper) Dugan for reppin’ many years for the women).  I’ve been the commissioner of said league for all of these years too.  I’m not sure who came up with the idea of the league, but it’s named after one of my best buds since 8th grade, Barry Blanton (the “B”) and myself the “K”.  Not super creative, but hey, it was 1995 – a year in which President Bill Clinton was dealing with the Whitewater scandal, “Braveheart” was winning the Academy Award for best picture, and the Macarena was sweeping the nation.

That same August this league kicked off with it’s first draft in the basement of the Midtown Plaza in downtown Norman, OK with just some crate paper and a sharpie and about 12 people with pen, paper and fantasy football magazines.  We utilized the hot technology of the time – fax machines and made actual voice telephone calls to put in starting lineups during the season.

As commissioner I had to use the actual newspaper to calculate scoring every Monday morning and then again on Tuesday morning after Monday Night Football.  We used the Terry Bradshaw fantasy football scoring system which basically said 6 points for every touchdown with bonus points added for the length of the touchdown scored and the kickers got 1, 3, 4, or 5 points depending upon whether it was a extra point or field goal from over 50 or 40-49 yards or 39 yards and in.  It was pretty simple and there weren’t too many complexities in figuring up the score every week.

terrybradshaw

Yes, even back in 1995 Steeler legend Terry Bradshaw was into fantasy football!

Of course, being the sometimes creative writer that I am, I always produced some sort of “news” with the results which was really nothing more than an opportunity for me to hurl veiled insults at the owners and their teams.  Kevin Hopper’s Wire to Wire team won the very first championship and he even purchased a trophy (below, which I still keep in the garage).  We took an official photograph together also of myself handing him the trophy.  I think I still have the photo somewhere, but I’m not positive.  I asked Kevin at our draft on Sunday how long he thinks this league can last and he said he doesn’t see it ending anytime soon.  We joked about all being in an assisted living center and using the dining area  about 2 pm for our draft just before bed.

bktrophy

The trophy which lasted for 11 champions and losers.

“See the men paint their faces and cry.  Like some girl it makes you wonder why.”

Fantasy football is not for the weak or the pathetic or the lonely.  You have to be tough and many times have perseverance to make it in fantasy!  It can be a cruel, cruel, fictitious pretend world!  You would think in a league like ours that is starting its’ 21st season that most of the teams would have tasted a league championship by now.   Maybe even multiple championships.  At least one, right?  Wrong.  Of the original teams still in this, and as I recall the original members still playing (there were only 12 teams the first season) include  Kevin Hopper, Blanton, Jeff Hopper, Mike Cochran, Jim Pence, Scott Humphreys, Scott Shaw and myself still remain.

hop

The first champ, Kevin Hopper, making a selection at our draft in 2013

Of the originals only Kevin Hopper (3 time champ), Blanton/Jeff Hopper (once as co-owners), Cochran (the godfather of the league – a league-leading 5 time champ) and myself (just once) are the only ones to have won a B&K championship.  Yes, that means that Pence, Humphreys, and Shaw are a combined 0 for 60!  I love that stat and I will probably use it at some point this season.  We have others that have come and gone through the years with some of those that have been in the league for nearly 20 years as well that have yet to win it.

bkffl

Just two titles between these four teams (l-r myself, the Commish, Brent McMullan, Blake Rambo, and Blanton).  I first met these three men as pubescent 8th graders in 1984 in at Whittier Middle School in Norman, OK where we all started for the 8th grade basketball team.

We started the league with 12 teams and then went to 16 teams and then to our current 20 teams in 2004.   Over these 20+ years the scoring system has changed numerous times and technology has improved so that everything is kept track of on our league website at rtsports.com.  We’ve also had very little attrition over the years.  Sure we have had some teams leave, and we’ve had many name changes as well.  If you’ve been in the league a long time I will throw these names at you.  Some of these owners are still in the league and some have long since moved on – Heavy A’s, A Team Named Moe, Bald Eagles, Scuba, Bebe’s Kids, Baba Booey, Lizard Kings, Bionic Fighter Pilots, Sooner Killer, Stogies, AndaQuarter, Lookin’ for a ‘W’, S, S, & T, Nuts & Bolts, Stiff as Hell, Dead Money, and The Plunger.  Only one team has left the league in recent memory (Scuba), and that was about 3 seasons ago.  Before that, I don’t even remember when the last team to leave was.

“So forget all that you see.  It’s not reality.  It’s just a fantasy.”

Sure, fantasy football is just that – fantasy, make-believe, pretend.  Whatever you want to call it is fine, but it’s also big business now with the emergence of daily fantasy games in all sports in recent years.  But, for the twenty something of us in the B&K FFL, it’s just fun, and it’s a great way to keep in touch.  So as the 21st season sets to kickoff, once again coveted bragging rights and a little money are on the line with the B&K FFL.  And, in about 30 years if you’re ever visiting an assisted living facility and you see a bunch of old men and one woman with pen, paper, magazines, and curious looking draft boards you could be in the presence of B&K’s golden anniversary.

“Can’t you see what this crazy life is doing to me?”

Even though this is really a 90’s and beyond thing, this 80’s song by Aldo Nova is a fitting theme and song for this post.  Plus, there’s just so much to like about this video starting with Aldo Nova’s skin-tight leopard print wardrobe!  Pretty sure I would buy that if I ever came across it in some sort of novelty store.  His guitar also serves as a laser during the 1:25 non-music intro.  Lasers, helicopters, skin-tight leopard print – what more can you ask for in an 80’s video!  This was a #23 hit on the Billboard Hot 100 chart back in 1982, and it’s really the only hit by Canadian guitarist Aldo Nova, “Life is Just a Fantasy.”

Thanks for reading.

sincerely,

the 80’s

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | 1 Comment

“I’ve Got a Pocket Full of Quarters”

Posted on August 24, 2016 by Double K

“and I’m headed to the arcade” – Buckner & Garcia

The 80’s helped mainstream the video arcade.  These places were usually dark and dim and many times included cigarette smoke wafting through the air.  There was typically loud 80’s rock or pop music blaring from the speakers as beeps and boops and blips came from every machine.  It was a refuge from the parents.  A safe-haven in an alternate universe.  It was the ultimate playground for many of us in the early to mid-80’s.

You had your recreational players like me that were on whatever budget the parents would grant.  For me, that was usually three or four dollars.  And then you had your serious players who were either kids with wealthy parents or summertime mowing jobs.  Or you had your adults with jobs that could spare $20 trying to achieve bragging rights on their game of choice.  There were patterns to master and friends to impress, but there usually weren’t too many girls.  It wasn’t exactly cool to be introduced to the opposite sex like – “Hey, this is my friend John.  He’s the best Donkey Kong player in the area.”  That was not going to impress the ladies.

“I’m going to fake to the left and move to the right.”

pac-man

There were always stories to tell and most of them were the equivalent to poker players and their “bad beats.”  “Speedy caught me four pellets shy of getting to the ninth key!  It sucked man!” or “I totally mistimed my jump in Donkey Kong, and I was only 500 points from getting the high score and now I’m out of quarters!”  Yep, everyone that played had some kind of story on one level or another.

Recently, my wife, daughter, and I spent the better part of three hours on Saturday at a local arcade for our nephew’s birthday party.  You literally feel like you’re back in the 80’s when you step inside.  It’s a totally rad place, and it’s located in Fayetteville, Arkansas. This place of nostalgia is called Arkadia.  It has all of the classics – the Pac-Man’s, the Donkey Kong’s, Asteroids, Burgertime, Frogger, Tron, Journey, Joust, and many many more.  For a set price you can go in and play as long as you want.  There is even a tv set hooked up to an old Atari 2600 if you want sit on a vintage couch and play those old Atari games that you thought were just the coolest thing ever back in the early 80’s.

SONY DSC

I owned this piece of 80’s awesomeness – the Atari 2600!

The old Atari 2600 was a far cry from the actual machine game back then though.  Anyone remember the wait for Pac-Man to come out only to realize it was pretty lame?  Pac-Man didn’t even eat round pellets.  They were square, and Pac-Man didn’t even face north or south.  He always faced east or west regardless of what direction he travelled!  And Donkey Kong followed but it didn’t have all the levels that the arcade machine had.  Another tv in Arkadia played classic episodes of “Scooby Doo” while we were in there.

arkadia

My beautiful wife, aka the Galaga Queen, and me, dominating Q*bert.  I earned style points for the one-hand-in-the-pocket look!

 

In 1982-1983 WTBS hosted a game show called “Starcade” and I loved it.  I loved it so much that my 11 year old self mailed in a postcard to be a contestant on the show.  I was beyond excited when I received one back in the mail weeks later with an invitation to try out.  I was, however, less than enthusiastic when I learned I had to figure out my own transportation to Los Angeles just to try out for the show.  I was not even guaranteed a spot!  Weren’t they aware of my Burgertime prowess?  I quickly realized that getting to Los Angeles was going to be a problem, so my dreams of being a tv gameshow superstar on “Starcade” were dashed as quickly as my spaceship in Defender (I was terrible at Defender).

If you don’t remember this show, you can find multiple episodes on youtube.  Mark Richards was the original host of the show.  Below is just one of the episodes, and if you have a spare 23 minutes to watch it’s worth your time.  If not, here are the highlights of the clip:  it’s a 30 something-year-old named John with plans to write the great American comedy who gets insulted by Richards (Richards says he looks like Jerry Lewis in “The Nutty Professor”; not exactly an awesome compliment).  John goes up against a girl named Heidi probably about 20 years younger who apparently is a back-up on Broadway for the well known production of “Annie.”  John dominates the questions but Heidi kicks his tail and even wins her own video game.  John may be the stereotypical looking “nerd” but he was not a very good video game player.

“I got all the patterns down, up until the ninth key”

Of course this post has to feature the most popular video game song ever and a song that I owned.  Heck, I owned the whole album.  Yes, there was a Pac-Man Fever album made up of nothing but classic arcade game songs.  The title track made it all the way up to #9 on the Billboard Hot 100 charts in 1982.  The game and the song literally swept the nation that year as other Pac-Man games followed (Ms. Pac-Man, Baby Pac-Man, Super Pac-Man) as did Pac-Man cereal and even a Pac-Man cartoon.

pacmanfeverkk

I had Pac-Man Fever as you can see from the picture above with my mom, sister and friends Brandon (middle) and Brian (right).

My friend Brandon and I would walk a few miles from our houses to the local Wal-Mart in Seminole, OK with some quarters in hand and spend some time playing Pac-Man which was located in the entryway before going into the store.  First of all, yes, I just said we walked a couple miles as 10 or 11 year olds.  For you youngsters, there were times where you weren’t worried to let your kids roam all over town.  But I digress.  Secondly, I was no Pac-Man master even though I owned one of those “cheat” books that gave you patterns to beating the game. But, I had neither the desire to study every detail, nor the bankroll to accomplish the feat even I did so desire.  I also owned a similar guide to beating Donkey Kong (below), but still ended up with the same results.  But more than anything, for Brandon and I, it was just a fun way to kill a few hours on one of those long summer days growing up.

beatingdonkeykong

“It’s driving me crazy”

Without further adieu, here is that unique duo of Jerry Buckner and the late Gary Garcia performing on “American Band Stand.”  I love that just before the video cuts off at the end, host Dick Clark is heard saying something along the lines of “that’s strange…”  Dick was clearly confused at the popularity and success of this song about a video game, but the rest of the nation was not!  We all had “Pac-Man Fever”…

 

Thanks for indulging me on a trip down memory lane.  Go check out Arkadia Retrocade in Fayetteville if you’re ever in the area, and as always, thanks for reading.

Sincerely,

the 80’s

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | Leave a comment

“You Tell Her You Don’t Have the Time”

Posted on August 17, 2016 by Double K
grandma

I tried to talk my grandma into recreating our old picture for her 100th birthday, but she said no.

That quote above is from Kenny Rogers, but let’s talk about time.  How’s this for time…

In 1916, much of the world was in the midst of World War I, and the British introduced tanks for the first time in war.  Woodrow Wilson was President of the United States and would get re-elected in November, and Weeghman Park, now known as Wrigley Field, opened in 1916.  On August 12th of 1916, my grandmother, Ruby Ellen (Jackson) Duke was born.

We just celebrated that milestone.  In the last 100 years my grandma has lived through stock market crashes, The Great Depression, the dust bowl era, the building of the Empire State Building, the Holocaust, World War II, wars in Vietnam and Korea and in the Gulf.  She’s seen prohibition, the first man in space, the civil rights movement, and every Super Bowl.  Her first Olympics was the 1920 games in Belgium that featured the first flying of the Olympic flag (the U.S. led the medal count that year as well with 95 medals; 41 of which were gold).  She has lived through parts or all of 17 different presidents with an 18th one coming this November.

Yes, my grandma has seen much in her lifetime.  At her party on Saturday, where some 70 people showed up to honor her, we heard from her children, nieces and nephews, grandchildren, pastors, and friends.  One of her best friends, Mavis Bacon, was in attendance at 97 years young.

My grandma has often said that she feels like she’s lived three different lives.  One before she was married, one while she was married to my grandpa Kay Duke, and a third as a widow for over 40 years since he passed away.

One of the great things about growing up with a grandma like Ruby was that she was the central location for most holidays – especially Easter, Thanksgiving, and Christmas.  Christmas was one of my favorite times and memories growing up because that meant I was most likely going to see my Duke cousins (Jennifer, Kimberlee, and Kasey).

Usually I was the oldest grandchild at these Christmas gatherings and when I was about 12 or 13 I started “producing” Christmas plays like a young Martin Scorsese.  Every Christmas Eve I organized the grandchildren that were there which normally included my sister Kari, and my cousins Jennifer, Kimberlee, and Kasey, and we put on our own live theater production.  There were often two acts to these “elaborate” plays that lasted all of 10 or 15 minutes.  Our play budget and wardrobe involved whatever we could find to use around the house.  Usually the first act involved some sort of take on Frosty the Snowman or Santa and Rudolph and the second act usually involved the story of Jesus’ birth.

biblechristmas

l-r the angel Kimberlee, Me producer-extraordinaire, Kasey aka Joseph, Kari the shepherd, and Jennifer aka Mary (holding our Lord and Savior, baby Jesus)

Probably the most memorable skit came when I was a 17 year old senior in high school, and I think it was probably our last play to perform.  I’m pretty sure I graduated the following spring, and by this time Jennifer and Kimberlee were probably thinking it wasn’t quite as fun or cool anymore to play Santa or Frosty as they approached their teen years.

Anyway, during the late 80’s and early 90’s one of the most popular “Saturday Night Live” skits was that of the two muscle-bound Austrian jocks named Hans and Franz played by Dana Harvey and Kevin Nealon.

screen-shot-2015-02-12-at-4-03-09-pm

80’s icons Hans (Dana Carvey) and Franz (Kevin Nealon) and they were here to “pump you up.”

Well, that Christmas, the title of the play was “Hans (played by myself) and Little Franz (played by Kasey) Save Christmas.”  Santa was deathly ill, and was not going to be able to deliver presents to all the boys and girls of the world that year.  Fortunately for him Hans and Little Franz were in the neighborhood and showed up at the North Pole just in time with a concocted vitamin and protein formula drink that cured him instantly.  Hans and Little Franz pumped Santa up and helped to save Christmas.  It was one of our finest hours as a live theater, and one that still gets mentioned to this very day by grandma and the others that were fortunate enough to be in attendance at this masterpiece.  I loved every minute of putting these productions on and it was a definite highlight of our Christmas Eve celebration.

Kasey and I actually brought Hans and Little Franz out of retirement and performed a short skit at grandma’s 90th birthday (I’m sure there are some pictures or video somewhere).  I considered doing it for number 100 as well, but didn’t think it would be missed if we didn’t.  But, apparently I was wrong when grandma called Kasey and I out in front of everyone during the party.  I guess Hans and Little Franz missed their golden opportunity on grandma’s golden celebration.

hansfranz

Hans and Little Franz save Christmas circa Christmas 1988 in Norman, OK with Kari, Kim (the enthusiastic looking one), & Jennifer

My grandma is an extraordinary woman who has lived an incredible faith-filled life and has probably touched thousands of lives both directly and indirectly.  When I see or think of my grandma, among many wonderful thoughts and memories, I think mostly of one thing – family.  I owe a great deal to her for my views on family and what it means to love and honor and sacrifice for each other in the family.  Even at 100, my grandma continues to build on and leave a tremendous legacy through her children, grandchildren, and now great grandchildren.  The celebration of her 100th birthday was quite an honor for her, but in actuality it’s all of us that are honored by having her in our lives.

Myself, Kari, Grandma, Tina (Jennifer’s half sister), Kim & Kasey aka “Little Franz”

“Love will turn you around, turn you around.”

There’s usually an 80’s reference in my posts and I’m not going to leave you without one today, but it’s pretty hard to find a song and/or video that encompasses a 100 year life, so I’m choosing a song from a man that my grandma likes, my parents like, and I like.  In the world of music that trifecta is hard to do, but during the late 70’s and early 80’s there weren’t too many performers with charisma and that were more popular than “The Gambler,” Kenny Rogers.

Kenny wasn’t just a hit-producing machine during those years, but also tried his hand at being a movie star back in 1982 with a race car movie called “Six Pack.”  The movie, which also starred Diane Lane, Erin Gray, Anthony Michael Hall, and Barry Corbin, featured Rogers as race car driver Brewster Baker and a group of six orphans who made for quite an entertaining pit crew.

I went to this movie when I was 11 with my mom and grandma.  The movie was definitely not going to win any Academy Awards and will probably be most remembered by my 11 year old self as having a lot of cursing during the movie especially by the character called “Swifty.”  Even at the end, little Harry (probably 7 or 8 years old) drops the line “No shit, Dick Tracy” to everyone’s amusement, except probably not my mom’s or grandma’s.  I’m sure they were hoping for a little milder language with 11 year old me in attendance.  The movie would probably push up on the PG-13 rating today (PG-13 didn’t start as a rating until 1984) for its’ language.

“Well it’s your mind that tricks you in believin’ everytime.”

Regardless, I only remember seeing one other movie with my grandma, and that was the what-seemed-like ten hour marathon of torture called “Ghandi” starring Ben Kingsley also from 1982.  It went on to win the Academy Award for Best Picture much to my 11 year old dismay.  But, surprisingly, the musical soundtrack for “Ghandi” pales in comparison to my man Kenny’s hit song from “Six Pack.”  Here is Kenny, rocking his 1980-something beard, and sounding good with a live performance of his #1 hit “Love Will Turn You Around.”

As always, thanks for reading.

sincerely,

the 80’s

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , , , , | 2 Comments

“I Don’t Know Where I’m Goin'”

Posted on August 14, 2016 by Double K

“But I sure know where I’ve been.” – Whitesnake

It’s over.  I know where I’m goin’ to.  It’s called “old and uncool land.”  I know many of you are sitting there and thinking to yourselves – no way Kyle!  You will never be old and uncool!  Well, you’re probably right and I appreciate that, but let me tell you what rocked my boat recently (only someone old and uncool would use the phrase “rock my boat.”).  I love watching the Olympics with all of its pageantry and stories and inspiration.  So, I was watching on Sunday night as the coverage went to a commercial break.  As I was looking through a magazine laying on my couch I heard probably my favorite 80’s song of all-time coming from the tv.  It was the unmistakable lyrics of David Coverdale and his band Whitesnake and their #1 hit released in 1987 – “Here I Go Again.”  Only it wasn’t David Coverdale’s voice I heard immediately.  It sounded like kids singing.

davidc

Ladies and gentlemen, some of the best hair of the 80’s – David Coverdale!

“Hanging on the promises in the songs of yesterday.”

I immediately reached for the remote to crank up the volume while wondering what strange and wonderful product was utilizing this hairband masterpiece for its product!  Would I see 1987 Tawny Kitaen prancing around and advertising the latest deal on a brand new Jaguar?  Would 1987 David Coverdale be pimping some cool shades or promoting the latest in leather pants from whomever makes leather pants?  Who was about to get my business by being cool and wealthy enough to buy the rights to use this song?

I anxiously looked up and what did I see?  No David Coverdale.  No Tawny Kitaen.  No Jaguars or leather pants makers.  There wasn’t even one long-haired band member to be seen anywhere.  No pyrotechnics.  No nothing.  It was a lot of elementary school kids with back to school supplies and clothes advertising for Wal-Mart!  Freakin’ Wal-Mart.

“Oh Lord, I pray you give me strength to carry on”

I have absolutely nothing against Walmart.  I live about 15 miles from the Walmart corporate headquarters in Bentonville, AR.  We have Walmarts everywhere around here.  I shop at the new super center less than a mile from our house all of the time.  Walmart is not the only economy driver here in NW Arkansas, but it is most definitely the captain of our economical ship.  There would not be a lot of the amenities that make NW Arkansas one of the premiere places to live in the U.S. without big blue.  This area is a great place to live, and much thanks goes to the late Sam Walton and many of his children that help to continue the legacy.  But man, when you think of cool companies, Walmart does not come to mind.  And with the world’s largest retailer utilizing this classic 80’s song in a commercial they officially dragged me and my 80’s-loving-Whitesnake-self down with it.

“Just another heart in need of rescue.”

tawny

Tawny had to have helped Jaguar sales in the late 80’s, right?

When I hear the song, I think of loud music, fast cars, and hot women on a warm summer day.  Not a bunch of elementary school kids still learning to wipe their noses.  The song was an anthem for me in the summer of 1988 when I was 17.  I would manually roll down the windows of my first car – a 1984 Camaro, pop in my Whitesnake cassette tape and cue up “Here I Go Again.”  I love the slow intro with only vocals and a keyboard that builds in momentum.  Then, probably next to Phil Collins’ “In the Air Tonight,” it has the best air drum part for an 80’s song in my opinion.  I would hit those air drums on my steering wheel and do my best to drive the speed limit down main street in Norman, Oklahoma.  I was pretty sure that Tawny Kitaen would magically appear at any moment, jump in my car, and start trying to make out with me causing me to pull into Sonic for something to cool us off while all of my friends stared in disbelief at my good fortune.

“And I’ve made up my mind.  I ain’t wasting no more time.”

Alas, Tawny never materialized but I wore that Whitesnake cassette out mostly playing this song, “Still of the Night,” and “Is This Love.”  But, it will always be “Here I Go Again” that will forever remain with me.  The song is about the young and carefree days of experiencing short and shallow romances, and longing for something more.  1988 was a much simpler time.  It wasn’t always an easy time, but nothing in this life is promised to be easy.  That car and that song will forever be linked by time and by memory, and no world-wide major retailer with a slightly funny commercial will ever take that away.

firstcar

My sister and me with my first car (and hers too) – the Blade-mobile, an ’84 Camaro Norman, OK

“Cause I know what it means to walk along the lonely street of dreams.  And here I go again on my own.”

Not only one of the best songs of the 80’s, but one of the best videos as well.  No Walmart ads, just the young and awesomeness of Whitesnake and Tawny Kitaen getting ready to hit you right in the face…

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

“Welcome to Your Life”

Posted on August 10, 2016 by Double K

hqdefault

“Welcome to your life.  There’s no turning back” – Tears for Fears

Recently I had the privilege of spending a few hours in the company of former coaches and players that were brought together to celebrate the career of their former coach and athletic director in Ft. Smith, Arkansas.

rowland

The event was called an “Evening of Influence,” and it was organized by the Fellowship of Christian Athletes Arkansas chapter and honored Jim Rowland and Bill Stancil.  I know neither of these gentlemen.  Stancil passed away in 1991, and I’ve met Jim Rowland once briefly to shake his hand.  Coach Rowland just retired in June after many years as athletic director in Ft. Smith which followed his coaching days.  Both men were honored by a large and diverse group including coaching greats like former Ft. Smith and Bentonville high school football coach Barry Lunney Sr. and current Auburn football coach Gus Malzahn who both were featured speakers.  Also, long-time state and current U.S. Senator John Boozman was on hand to speak and pay tribute as well.

gus

Myself along with two men of great influence – John Kopta (left) and Gus Malzahn (middle)

It was such a nice and pleasant diversion from what we are seeing on tv, on the internet, everywhere these days as this country wages back and forth in our quadrennial run for President of the United States.  All I see in this circus parade is people scooping up the elephant dung and hurling it at each other.  The candidates are all about me, me, me.  Yes, they talk about what they think is good for America and all the people they will help if elected, but what it really comes down to is “look at me and what I can do for you.”  Me, me, me.  Blah, blah, blah.

That’s why it was so nice Sunday night to hear about men that had spent their lives dedicating it to others.  They humbly built up those around them and tried to do what was right regardless of what the majority may have wanted (there was a nice recollection of their importance handling integration in the Ft. Smith public school system).  I listened intently as the speakers used words like “character,” “professionalism,” “impact,” “influence,” and “faith.”  I felt like I knew Jim Rowland and Bill Stancil after the evening ended and would have been proud to have supported either of them through the years.

“We will find you acting on your best behavior.”

Even though I don’t know Coach Rowland personally I feel like I know the type of man he is because I had the great pleasure of playing for outstanding coaches in my life that shaped and molded me as a young man.

I grew up with the best coach of them all – my dad.  I never formally played basketball on any teams he was a coach of, but instead I had the honor of playing for three other great basketball coaches – Tony Robinson at Norman High School in Norman, OK, Don Sumner at St. Gregory’s College in Shawnee, OK, and Ken Hayes at Northeastern State University in Tahlequah, OK.  They were three unique individuals with different personalities and styles, but they impacted lives (they still continue to), and they all cared about their players.  I learned from each of them.

If you’ve ever been involved in organized athletics, and spent time around a good coach then you know what I am talking about.  It can make all the difference in your adolescent life.  I feel like if someone built a museum for my life that all three of these men would have statues in there.  This post would turn quite lengthy if I tried to go into detail about each one so I will save separate posts for each one for a different day.

everybody-wants-to-rule-the-world-tears-for-fears-20642478-720-540

Just a cool part of the video that I chose to use in this post.  I only wish I had moves like these guys on the dance floor back in the 80’s.

“Help me make the most of freedom and of pleasure.”

There’s nothing like a gathering of ex-players and coaches for an event to make you think about legacy and what your legacy will look like one day.  The great thing is that we’re never really through leaving a legacy while blood pumps through your veins.  As long as you continue to breath in and out in this world there is still time to speak into another life, be a better a friend, a better spouse, or help someone in need.  You never know who God will put in your path.  Coaches affect many young men and women every year, and I can’t think of too many more impactful professions.

Originally titled “Everybody Wants to go to War,” the song was a late addition to the TFF album “Songs From the Big Chair,” but went on to spend two weeks at #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1985.  According to Curt Smith, the song is about the quest for power and all that goes with it, and that’s why I picked this song for this post because it’s also a reminder, as Uncle Ben said to Peter Parker in “Spiderman” – “with great power comes great responsibility.”  Think about the power you’ve been given in your life and who you influence on a daily basis and think about those you influence that you don’t even know about (and I guarantee you there are some of those people as well).

“Nothing ever lasts forever.  Everybody wants to rule the world.”

Don’t try and rule the world.  Try to live a life worthy of a legacy and you will live a life well-lived.  If ruling the world, or even “ruling” the United States requires that I behave like the candidates and the supporters I see on tv, hear on the radio, see on the internet, then a life in an actual circus may be a better and more worthy choice.

Thanks for reading.

Sincerely,

the 80’s

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 1 Comment