“We’re Soul Alone”

Posted on December 7, 2024 by Double K

“And soul really matters to me.” – Darryl Hall & John Oates

Too much.

Some people, some words just tap into your inner soul like a long lost relative grabbing hold and refusing to let go. Somewhere, maybe a place you’ve long forgotten about, screams “thank you” as an inspiring voice triggers happy endorphins within your brain that rise through your veins at the very prospect of releasing words hidden out of sight perhaps in a barricaded box under lock and key.

Geez, I don’t know where that paragraph came from. Perhaps it came from the reading I’ve been doing lately – interesting books, news sites, sports and entertainment blogs, and Americana travel pieces (check out A.M. Hickman’s “Falling Back in Love With America” project if you like well-written Americana travel pieces). Maybe it’s a cocktail of the former with a splash of the nonsensical lyrics of my favorite 80’s duo, Darryl Hall and John Oates. Or it could also be that it’s just the holiday season with the lights and the decorations and the sounds that open up wormholes of creativity that have been closed since January.

Whatever the case…

Manic moves and drowsy dreams
Or living in the middle between the two extremes

As my wife and I meandered through downtown Springdale, Arkansas, I thought about the extremes of the city we’ve called home for over 20 years now. Springdale is now a city on the verge of 90,000 and the signs of progress and commercialization were everywhere. Literally. “Pictures with Santa,” “Christmas on the Creek,” “Free Pony Rides,” “Hot Cocoa,” “Train Rides,” “25% Off Sales!” Commercialization for holidays continues to grow like that potato vine you planted to occupy a few square feet in a bed but has now grown over the bed and threatens to take way more space than you originally planned. I may or may not have experience in this particular department.

Originally called Shiloh, around 1838, Springdale became Springdale in 1878 once it was incorporated by Washington County. Soon after progress followed with roads and a railway following the Civil War. The roads paved the way for numerous trucking companies including Springdale-based Harvey Jones’ Jones Truck Lines. Willis Shaw, Joe Robinson, and JB Hunt followed suit in the NW Arkansas region in the years after. Agriculture with apple and peach orchards were an important part of growth in the area as well as poultry when CL George and his sons began transporting live chickens to Kansas City and St. Louis around 1929 before expanding into the chicken feed business 10 years later. Missouri native John Tyson saw the potential in NW Arkansas and moved his family to Springdale in 1931 where he started delivering chickens to larger markets in Missouri. Tyson Foods is now one of the largest processor and marketers of chicken, beef, and pork in the world.

Classic Christmas music was ringing and children were singing… or maybe they were just playing in the creek in their matching pajamas after getting their photo taken with St. Nick, because it doesn’t get much better than playing in water when you’re a kid.

The holidays can be difficult for many, but I’d surely encourage you to get out to your local establishments, your favorite park, or maybe just drive around and look at the lights in the warmth of your vehicle. Soak in that Christmas spirit even if you do it begrudgingly. You’ll be better for it. Appreciate the decorations, the lights, the music… let it exist in and around you and take some time to reflect on where you are, where you want to go, what your community is about, and how you can make this season better for someone else, because I guarantee you someone you know is having it worse than you are right now. Make it better for someone else like I’m making this post better for you by ending it and giving you another classic 80’s tune below.

A very Merry Christmas season to you all.

Broken ice still melts in the sun
And times that are broken can often be one again

From the “Big Bam Boom” album, here is the number one song on this week 40 years ago, which was also the duo’s last #1 hit. I’ve always been a big fan of John Oates and his vocals on the word “time” throughout the song. Just something about seeing him chime in with “time” on this song always makes me smile. Here is the Philly duo, Hall & Oates with another 80’s classic, “Out of Touch.”

Thanks for reading.

sincerely,

the80s

Luke 2:11

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“I’m On My Way”

Posted on November 25, 2024 by Double K

“I’m on my way. Home, sweet home.” – Motley Crue

photo by Ross Marino, 1985

“I had to run away high, so I wouldn’t come home low.”

With the holidays upon us, much will be made in the coming weeks about the word “home.” You’ll hear it all the time, everywhere. It will come up in conversation with friends and neighbors and co-workers. You’ll see it and hear it with every sappy Hallmark Christmas movie you watch or don’t watch depending upon your stance regarding such movies. You’ll hear “home” sung about over holiday-themed speakers in restaurants and retail shops everywhere you go… “There’s No Place Like Home for the Holidays,” “Christmas, Please Come Home,” “I’ll Be Home for Christmas.” Home is everywhere and yet, home is nowhere. Home tends to meander through life like a chameleon blending into whatever surroundings the time and season dictate. Do we even know where or what home is anymore?

Growing up, home was pretty easily defined for me as where mom and dad and my sister were, in whatever house we occupied. Home also meant grandma’s house for holidays because that was home for mom. As I aged, home became the place where I grew up the most – the formative years shall we say from 8th grade through high school. Then, home became where the jobs took me, becoming at times a conflicting mirage of towns and cities of where my parents lived and the places I where I lived. Homes from the past changed, faded, and became distant memories. Then one day, home becomes a spouse and a child and before you know it, 22 years has passed and you’re left wondering how this particular place, this house, became your home and you’re left pondering how quickly it has all passed.

But alas, times change, homes change, we grow older, softer. After all, we are but flesh, a passing breeze that does not return. Music does the same. It grows older and softer yet it remains long after our physical bodies. Maybe that’s the appeal of being a musician. Maybe that’s the appeal of being a writer. The leaving of a legacy through music, through word. Something “permanent,” whatever that means. What was once “loud” or “hard” or “dangerous” listening in 1985 doesn’t hold much the same punch in 2024. Kind of like Mike Tyson’s punch in his recent fight against Jake Paul. “Iron” Mike looked older, softer, less dangerous. No longer the baddest man on the planet, much like music, his punches didn’t land with the same power, the same ferocity as they did in 1985. And why should they? Why did we even have expectations of such? Time is always the true champion.

And, this seems like the appropriate time in this post to pause for a non-paid commercial break…

First of all, that is one bad ass Canadian Goose! Audi is appealing to me with this commercial (though my wife really wants a Tesla). And did you catch the tag line – “There’s no place like the road home.” The road home.

As a profession, I work at a bank, and have been at the same bank for 11+ years now. We have one of those subscription music services that plays over our speaker system in the bank lobby and throughout the offices. The music is intended as background noise to help provide a little privacy to customers conducting business or to employees on phone calls. The musical choices change on occasion. There may be country music for a few weeks or Christmas music during the holiday season. Many times though we’re playing non-threatening, safe-for-work “oldies”music… you guessed it… 80’s music!

Occasionally, I’ll walk out of my office, shake my head in mock disgust and say something like “you know you’re getting old when Def Leppard is playing in the lobby.” Sometimes I’ll time my entrance into the lobby just so I can play the air drums to Phil Collins “In the Air” and sometimes I’ll walk out and announce to the punk twenty-somethings (if you’re reading this, you’re not really punks) I work with and say something like “a million dollars if you know who’s singing this song right now!” I haven’t lost a million dollars I don’t own yet. They never know unless on the rare occasion when their mom or dad made them listen to it when they were really young. I do have one co-worker though whose mom has been to somewhere around 20 Rolling Stones shows, so that’s cool, and she knows her Stones’ music. But, groups like Poison, RATT, Bon Jovi, or Motley Crue. These kids, they don’t know.

Of course these artists and these songs are happening more often in commercials as demonstrated above with The Crue providing a soundtrack for Audi. Honestly though, it could have been a commercial to legalize heroin and I still would have been like “yeah!” That’s how much I love this particular song. It’s on every favorites playlist I have that contains 80’s music. Maybe it’s the commonality of longing for “home.” Maybe the song taps on my heart strings like Tommy tapping gently on the ivory keys making my only want is for these pillars of rock and roll to make it home to loving embraces from family and friends after months of months of a grueling tour schedule. Maybe it’s just because I see the music video in my head every time I hear the song, and I love the music video almost as much as I love the song.

“Just take this song, and you’ll never feel left all alone.”

And I do so love the video. Scoff if you will, but the time lapses of the bus rolling down the highway and the “Theatre of Pain” tour set going up, Vince Neil kissing the posters pre-show, Tommy’s stick twirls, Nikki’s beckoning finger, Mick’s steady guitar, and of course, the slow motion crowd and concert shots – the screaming, the singing along, the girls running on and practically crawling onto stage only to be hauled off by security. And of course, the girl on the shoulders of her boyfriend at the 2;24 mark. If you know, you know. As a 14 year old in 1985, I watched this video in anticipation that just maybe one time someone at MTV would slip in an unedited version of the video late some night when no one was suspecting, and I would be a vigilant benefactor. They never did. I do wonder if the girls in the video are still out there, somewhere in their own homes occasionally watching this video from nearly 40 years ago smiling to themselves while their children and/or grandchildren shake their heads in bewilderment giggling and laughing at the silliness of it all as they watch mom or grandma forever immortalized in the best power ballad song and video of all time.

In an utter travesty, much like Vince Neil’s pink tiger-striped spandex in the video, today’s song barely cracked the top 100 in 1985 on the first go round of its’ release, but then managed to crawl to #37 the second time around when it was remixed and re-released in 1991. Still, the music industry should be ashamed. Heck, a cover version by well renowned hair metal fan Carrie Underwood hit #21 on the Billboard charts in 2009, and then another version which was a duet between country music singer Justin Moore and the Crue’s Neil peaked at #28 on the hot country single charts in 2014. The Crue had to go country to break into the top 30 with this song. Blasphemous!

Directed by Wayne Isham, and featuring now 76 year old actor Michael Berryman in the albeit unnecessary opening scenes of the video (he also appeared in The Crue’s “Smokin’ in the Boys Room” video), here is Vince, Tommy, Nikki, and Mick with a video that topped MTV’s daily request chart for over three months. Here is Motley Crue with their last song to crack the top 40, “Home Sweet Home”…

Thanks for reading, and may your home be wherever you are this holiday season.

sincerely,

the80’s

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“Everyday, the Game is Ours to Play”

Posted on October 19, 2024 by Double K

“Oh tell me why, there are no alibis.” – Sammy Hagar

I have a new favorite New York Yankees’ baseball player.

He’s no relation to Sammy Hager, and trust me, I don’t like using the words “favorite” and “Yankees” in the same sentence together either. I’ve never been a fan of the Bronx Bombers, but today I will make an exception for one solitary player in pinstripes. With no apologies whatsoever to those of you who want to hail Aaron Judge or love robo-pitcher Gerrit Cole or are mesmerized by the bulging biceps of Giancarlo Stanton, my favorite Yankee is a six-foot-four slender, sidewinding southpaw pitcher named Tim Hill.

Who?

If you’re a Yankees fan, then you know. If you don’t, Hill is a middle innings to late innings reliever the Yankees deploy for an inning or so in tight games, many times to face tough opposing left handed hitters. But the toughest left handed hitters don’t compare to the nasty heater the game of life has already thrown at Tim Hill. The toughest left handed hitters don’t hit as hard as cancer, and Hill knows. Losing a father at any age is tough, and Hill lost his father to colon cancer when he was only 17.

Tim Hill was a decent baseball player, and I use the word “decent” because his best scholarship offer to play after pitching for Granada Hills Charter High School in Los Angeles was Palomar Community College in San Marcos. Not exactly SEC baseball. He only played at PCC one year before bouncing to another junior college in Colorado. That short stint didn’t work out and he found himself back home and working for a local moving company before being persuaded to take another stab at baseball.

He joined Bacone College in Muskogee, Oklahoma for two seasons where he pitched admirably enough earning NAIA All-American honorable mention. It was good enough to draw the attention of the Kansas City Royals, who drafted him in 2014 with the 963rd pick in the 32nd round. The MLB draft is now only 20 rounds if that tells you anything. At 25 years of age, Hill was the oldest player selected in the first year player draft so not much was expected of him, and just a short time later Hill was dealt another blow.

Nine months after being drafted, and nine years after his father had passed, Tim Hill was diagnosed with colon cancer.

The doctors removed half of his colon and put him on eight months of chemo. By the time he had completed eight months, the six foot four Hill had dropped to 150 pounds. He was given a clean bill of health in January 2016 and began working himself back into baseball shape. He gained 65 pounds in two and a half months and was back in minor league camp a year after his diagnosis.

In 2016 and 2017, he spent good chunks of time with the Northwest Arkansas Naturals, a AA affiliate of the Royals located about five miles from my house in Springdale, Arkansas. There’s a good chance I even saw Tim Hill pitch at some point during one of those seasons, but I don’t specifically remember him. He earned a spot on the Royals’ 40 man roster in November of 2017 which earned an auto invite to spring training. Hill made the Royals major league opening day roster and promptly made an inauspicious debut with the Royals on opening day, March 29, 2018, by hitting the first batter he ever faced in the major leagues, the Chicago White Sox’ Leury Garcia.

From there, Hill was traded to the San Diego Padres in July of 2020. Hill became a free agent in 2023 and signed a one year deal with the White Sox before being released on June 18th this season following a 5.87 ERA with 13 strikeouts in 23 innings. Two days later the Yankees signed him, and four months later Hill may be the surprise of a shaky Yankees relief staff that has done just enough (as of this writing) to put them on the verge of a trip to the World Series. A career 3.99 ERA pitcher, Hill’s ERA is a career-best 2.05 over 44 innings pitched since joining the Yankees.

Whether he’s pitching over his head right now, or he’s just figuring things out in a Yankees uniform, one thing has become apparently true to me. Where can I get a Tim Hill jersey?


“Winner takes it all
‘Til he breaks the fall
In time, he’ll make it over the top”

In 1987, Giorgio Moroder was hired to be the music supervisor of a Sylvester Stallone movie called “Over the Top.”

The phrase “over the top” refers to an arm wrestling technique used to gain leverage against your opponent. It’s also a term for a traditional baseball pitcher who’s mechanics of throwing a baseball are sometimes referred to as throwing over the top. Tim Hill is not your traditional pitcher. Tim Hill is not your traditional baseball player. He’s a sidewinder, a submarine style pitcher. A pitcher that releases the ball at a point and angle many players are not accustomed to seeing, because there aren’t many big league pitchers that throw like he does. Hill doesn’t run a triple digit fastball by hitters. In fact, he has a very average to below average fastball usually topping out in the low 90’s. He has some good breaking balls, but more than anything he’s fun to watch and he’s fun to cheer for.

“Hey
You listen when I say
There’s a dream
Oh, that’s coming true today, yeah”

Moroder offered today’s song to then Van Halen lead singer Sammy Hagar after original choice, Asia’s John Wetton didn’t sound “mean enough” when he sang it. The song made a little noise on the U.S. Rock Tracks chart (#3), but only peaked at #54 on the Billboard Top 100.

If you’ve never seen this Stallone movie that bounces somewhere between a father-son action drama and an anthem for the world of arm wrestling, then do yourself a favor and watch it sometime. You’ll need some intestinal fortitude to survive the first part of the movie, because the kid in the movie is about as annoying as any kid in any movie ever made, and this is not Stallone’s finest work, but at least you get a decent payoff when it hits the arm wrestling championships in the latter half of the movie. And how many movies have you ever watched with arm wrestling subject matter in it? Ok then.

In the meantime, with a little help from Sly, here is the video with some footage from the movie for the song, “Winner Takes it All”…

Thanks for reading, check out Tim Hill pitching for the Yankees before the season ends, and just remember: “The world meets nobody halfway. When you want something, you gotta take it”

sincerely,

the80s

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“Who Wants to Break the News About Uncle Joe?”

Posted on October 13, 2024 by Double K

“You remember Uncle Joe.” – Bob Seger

Bonus points for the Steve Martin shirt!

Every few months on a random Saturday, I get up early (for me), make some coffee, and drive about 15 minutes to Lake Fayetteville. I park by the Botanical Gardens, throw my tripod and scope over my shoulder and make the easy 10 minute walk to the Mulhollan Blind, a staple there since 2016. The blind was built in tribute to Paige Mulhollan, a local avid birder who passed away in 2012. I never met Paige, but I met his son Kelly, albeit briefly, one Saturday earlier this year when he stopped by obviously guiding a small group of birders around Lake Fayetteville.

I usually set up my scope, get my binoculars out, open my Merlin app on my phone and spend a few hours watching the bird activity around and on the water. There are people who stop by the blind and chat for a few minutes – photographers, other birders, and just nosy people walking along the nature path. There are kayakers paddling and fishermen fishing on the lake. I’ve spotted various hawks and bald eagles and kingfishers and blue herons along with all types of ducks and geese. The surrounding woods house all types of woodpeckers and warblers and everyday backyard birds like chickadees and cardinals and Blue Jays.

The blind is a quiet haven of thoughts and observations. It almost feels like a modern day invisibility cloak looking through the small cutout windows and watching. There is a voyeuristic feeling as the kayakers and fishermen carry on. Occasionally they’ll point to the blind probably wondering if or who is in there viewing the world around them in complete obscurity.

This particular beautiful morning in October, I got out of my vehicle and made the familiar walk to the blind only and at one point realized I had walked too far along the trail. I had come to an unfamiliar split in the path and a wooden walkway that I had never been on. I thought how strange it was that I missed the blind. I chalked it up to being deep in thought and turned around. I came upon the path where the Mulhollan Blind stood only when I arrived there was no blind and as I stood there looking, my only thought was “what the (insert loud hawk scream)?”

The blind was gone and this was all that was left.

A quick Google search informed me that the fire department had been called to a late night fire at the blind in late August. Whether it was arson or an “accident,” there is little doubt that someone was there shortly before it started given it was the only area of fire destruction. Kelly Mulhollan was quoted in that same article as saying that they hope to rebuild the blind.

Me too, Kelly. Me too.

Who wants to play those eights and aces?
Who wants a raise, who needs a stake?
Who wants to take that long-shot gamble
And head out for Fire Lake?

This blind marked the first of many’s for me. First time to use my Vortex scope. First of many waterfowl I’d never studied nor even paid attention to before. First of closeups of a bald eagle, a pileated woodpecker, and a snowy egret. I’m sure there were many firsts there for other avid birders, photographers, or walkers that just liked to stop in for a few minutes and look around.

Many firsts indeed, but maybe not a round of firsts like Bob Seger sings of in “Fire Lake,” his 1980 hit about taking risks. One of his self-proclaimed personal lyrical favorites, Seger’s song hit #6 on the charts upon its’ release as his first single in 1980 from his “Against the Wind” album which features the title track (a #5 hit) and “You’ll Accomp’ny Me” (a #14 hit). The album spent many weeks on the top albums charts peaking at #2. Never seen Bob live, but I’ve always loved Bob’s voice and admired his talent.

This is “Fire Lake”…

Thanks for reading.

sincerely,

the80’s

No, the irony is not lost me.

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Elly and the Kid

Posted on September 15, 2024 by Double K

The kid was there holding his sign before the game, in between innings, after the game. Wearing a Reds jersey with the number 44 on the back, the kid had short, dark hair tucked under his Reds hat, and looked to be about 11 or 12. He stood out amongst the sea of Brewers’ blue and gold at American Family Field, but he didn’t care. Half inning after half inning under the relentless afternoon August sun, the kid expectantly made the walk down the stairs from his 15th row seat in Milwaukee next to his dad with sign in hand. My nephew Keller and I would watch him get as close as he could to the visiting Cincinnati Reds dugout and then as he held up his sign staring at one player in particular and yelling his name as that player ran onto and off the field – “Elly!”

The sign itself was just your basic sheet of white cardboard that every kid in America has used for a school project at one time or another. The words from a large black marker formed a message that read: “Elly, you’re my favorite player. Trade you a pair of my sliding gloves for a pair of yours?” Fastened onto the board was a pair of white sliding gloves. On the reverse side of the board was the same message except it was written in Spanish, Elly’s native language.

Elly is Elly De La Cruz, the Cincinnati Reds’ 22 year old superstar and face of the franchise. De La Cruz, aka “La Cocoa” is a six foot five athletic freak of nature. The Dominican-born shortstop flashes an infectious smile, throws bullets from shortstop to first base, steals bases by the handful, and can unleash mammoth home runs with his powerful swing at any given moment. So, it’s understandable that the kid wanted a piece of De La Cruz, a big kid himself.

Photo by Dylan Buell/Getty Images

The last few seasons have seen the introduction of sliding gloves/mitts in major league baseball. They look kind of like the mittens your mom used to put on you when you were five only they’re more stylish in 2024.

It was practically impossible to do anything while wearing them when you were younger. Mittens sucked. It was like not having any hands. Now, they have finally found a decent use for them – major league baseball. They use them all of the time now in major league baseball after suffering through too many years of dislocated and broken digits from base stealers going in head first only to injure a finger against the base or against their opponents’ leg, foot, glove, etc. Now, when players reach base, out come the sliding gloves which are designed to reduce the risk of injury from friction and impact, and to improve grip and control to help prevent these injuries. Progress I guess.

Back to the kid. I watched him and his sign the entire game. I watched Elly. If Elly ever saw him, he didn’t show it. Time and again, straight into and out of the dugout Elly ran. These players have to focus during the game and it must be difficult especially for the more popular players like De La Cruz, but I still began to feel bad for the kid as did many of the other fans in the vicinity. Even my nephew yelled “Elly!” a few times trying to help the kid out. Elly went one for four that day, and the Reds held on for a 4–3 win over the Brewers, but the kid never got his sliding gloves. At least he hadn’t when we got up to leave shortly after the end of the game.

But I thought about the kid afterwards. I once heard that the measure of our faith is in our perseverance. It’s faith in whatever you choose to have faith in, so I imagined the kid’s faith in Elly through his afternoon of perseverance did finally paid off, and as the stadium was emptying out, the kid got his “Mean Joe moment” and Elly appeared from beneath the stadium somewhere and looked at the kid and as he tossed his sliding mitts to him, he said, “Hey kid, catch,” or maybe it was “Aquí niño, atrapar.” Maybe it didn’t happen, but maybe it did, and it gave me a good feeling to think that it did.

Gracias, Elly. Gracias.

“Dearly Beloved, We are gathered here today to get through this thing called life.”

Prince was simply known as “The Kid” in his 1984 movie “Purple Rain.” Elly has some Prince to him. He has some flare, some style, some nice drip. He has some stage presence, and man does he have some talent. These are all things that the multi-talented sports-fan Prince Rogers Nelson would have greatly appreciated. This song came out nearly 30 years before Elly was even born, but I feel like when Elly is doing Elly things, that the fans and the crowds can see the talent and feel the energy and they too will feel themselves drawn to and screaming for The Kid.

Come on readers. Let’s get nuts.

Thanks for reading.

sincerely,

the80s

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“Do You Remember the Days?”

Posted on September 10, 2024 by Double K

“We built these paper mountains then sat and watched them burn?” – Foo Fighters

A friend recently asked me what it’s like not having either parent living. I thought for a moment and responded with a simple phrase: “It’s quiet.”

I’ve had a lot of quiet moments since my dad’s passing in 2021 and my mom’s passing just a few months ago. Gone are the phone calls and the doctor appointments. Gone are the holiday gatherings and attorney meetings. No more physical therapy appointments. The errands to the grocery store, the bills that need to be paid, the checking accounts that need to be monitored, the correspondence with nurses and aides and staff. All. Gone.

I thought a lot about these moments and others last Saturday at the annual Walk to End Alzheimer’s event in NW Arkansas. It’s an event I’ve participated in the past, but this was the first time for me carrying the purple flower indicating a person who has lost a loved one to dementia. In the past, I had carried a yellow one as one of a caregiver. The purple one was heavier. It also seemed quieter.

Quiet were the footsteps of hundreds of others gathered for the same cause. Quiet were the others thinking similar thoughts and running through a similar gamut of emotions. It was not a celebration. It was not “fun,” but it was necessary and it was also heartbreakingly beautiful as hundreds of others carried yellow and orange and purple flowers. There were even a few blue flower carrying individuals signifying someone currently suffering from dementia, including Wally, whose wife spoke briefly before the walk began. Wally looked on at his wife, smiling… quietly.

There’s a gap now. A gap in activity. A gap in life. But from new gaps new growth can occur. Perhaps even one day that growth will be nothing more than fields and fields of white flowers signifying a cure for those suffering from dementia now and in the future. Until then, we keep living moments at a time.

“Now
For the very first time
Don’t you pay no mind
Set me free, again
To keep alive, a moment at a time”

The irony of today’s song title, “Walk” by Foo Fighters is that many dementia patients (including my mom) eventually lose their ability to walk and lose their ability to talk coherently. It’s the damnedest thing. I really don’t know how else to describe it. Walking one day. Unable to walk the next. The lyrics of the song also speak to learning to talk again. Dementia robs the person of coherent speech. Speaking in English one day. Speaking in mumbled gibberish the next. There were times I just pretended she was speaking in tongues and God understood her and that’s all that mattered.

Dementia sucks and well, if you’ve made it this far and haven’t wanted to go drinking just yet, then you already know this from your own personal experience, or maybe you just wanted to see if I could actually draw some sort of conclusion with a Foo Fighters’ song. Besides the obvious title, this video makes me smile. It makes me laugh. If you’re going to spend time caring or being around someone with dementia, you need to do plenty of both. You need to absorb the madness and the chaos and the complete absurdity of life’s cruelest disease with plenty of smiles and laughs and thankful prayers to offset all of the tears and frustration and anger that accompany it, because there will come a time when the quiet arrives, and a time when the quiet sets in. When it does, you may notice the sun and sky a little more. You might realize you haven’t had time to read a book in years… perhaps even The Good Book. You might feel the wind against your skin with a little more sensitivity. You might feel the pain in your lower back just a bit more from working in the yard, but you might embrace it because it means there is breath in your lungs and strength in your muscles, and that’s a wonderful thing. Or you might sit on your patio watching and contemplating a Northern Cardinal and its’ life as it sits at your bird feeder cracking open safflower seeds and staring back at you intently, curiously, quietly.

When the time comes, what will you do with your quiet?

“Learning to walk again
I believe I’ve waited long enough
Where do I begin?
Learning to talk again
Can’t you see I’ve waited long enough?
Where do I begin?”

Released in June of 2011, this Foo Fighters single went to #1 on the Billboard Rock Charts. The video is a homage to Joel Schumacher’s 1993 movie “Falling Down” starring Michael Douglas. This music video also won the 2011 Best Rock Video at the MTV Video Music Awards. If you like the Foos like I the Foos, and you don’t need any quiet for the next few minutes, then turn it up, smile, and enjoy…

Where do I begin?

sincerely,

the80s

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“Seven Years Went Under the Bridge”

Posted on June 30, 2024 by Double K

“Like time was standing still.” – OMD

Seven years seem like forever. Seven years seem like seven seconds.

I don’t get on Facebook much anymore, but sometimes I will just to see the “Facebook Memories” that pop up in my feed so that I can yet again be reminded of that ruthless unapologetic thief named Time. Several weeks ago I logged in and “On this day 7 years ago…” came up, but this particular post stuck with me a little longer than my normal passing glance. It was a picture posted by my high school friend Andrea from June of 2017, and it was of her parents and my parents posing outdoors for a picture together somewhere in Norman, Oklahoma most likely outside of Louie’s Bar & Grill or Charleston’s Restaurant, a couple of places my parents frequented while still living in Norman. The picture was particularly noteworthy, because it was just a few months later in 2017 that my dad would have a fall (one of several) that necessitated a lengthy stay in a skilled rehab facility. It also spurred the moving of my parents out of their house in Norman and into an assisted living facility closer to my wife and I in Rogers, Arkansas. My mom was in the early to middle years of her battle with dementia. My dad would recover from that particular fall in 2017, but another spill in May of 2021 would eventually lead to his death late in the summer of 2021.

We’ve always had time on our sides
Now it’s fading fast.

Several weeks ago I noticed my mom, now in the later stages of dementia, sleeping more, eating and engaging less. Several days ago, she was put under full time hospice care and on Saturday afternoon, June 29th she passed away peacefully with myself, my sister Kari, and her brother Rick near her bedside. Her grueling journey living with the cruelest of diseases had mercifully come to an end. It was both sad and happy at the same time. We laughed. We cried. We hugged. Now, she’ll be laid to rest in her beloved hometown of Pawhuska, Oklahoma where we’ll gather and laugh some more. We’ll cry some more. We’ll hug some more. And we’ll celebrate and reminisce about better days.

Biblically, the number seven represents completion and perfection, so nearly seven years since my parents moved here I know now they are both perfect and whole and together once again dancing and laughing and forever reunited. But through the seven years I’ve questioned God many times what the point was, what was He trying to teach her or me or anyone. Why couldn’t He heal her? Hell, why couldn’t he rid the whole world of dementia? We still have other diseases and plagues and cancer and unforeseen tragedies, so why do we need a mental disease that affects so many millions of people and loved ones every year? I tried negotiating. I yelled at Him. I argued with Him. I begged Him and pleaded that He end her suffering. I know that I will never fully understand nor receive the answers I sought this side of Heaven, and yet when He did end her suffering on Saturday, it still hurt. It still stung. That’s part of being human. And it continues to hurt and sting, but I’ll try to smile through the tears. I’ll try to laugh through the pain.

When I heard these lyrics from today’s post I had to pause again and ponder upon God’s perfect number, his perfect plan, and upon the last seven years in which I’ve had the distinct honor of helping to care for my parents. I haven’t done it by myself. There is no doubt about that. I may have been the point or the lead, but I could not have survived these past seven years truly without the undying and unwavering support of my wife, Rebekah, who made things go when I struggled. My sister Kari and her husband Nick stepped in and helped all while living in Wisconsin and raising two small children. Our daughter Caroline was amazing when called upon. My wonderful sister-in-laws, notably Roxanne, Sheila, and Sherry were unbelievable in the move from Norman seven years ago. My mom’s brother, my uncle Govan was always so encouraging and supportive and came for numerous visits through the years. There were also many friends and relatives that called, wrote, visited, and offered their support and love, and for that I will be forever grateful.

I feel like a chapter is closing. A chapter with some emotional highs and the lowest of lows, but a seven year span I wouldn’t trade for anything.

“Every second, every moment
We’ve got to, we’ve gotta make it last”

Perhaps OMD’s Andy McCluskey and Paul Humphreys hear their lyrics from their 1986 song and think the same thing: seven years seems like seven seconds, now.

Orchestral Manoeuvres in the Dark really only had two “hit” songs with “Enola Gay” being their other most recognizable song. But this particular song, OMD’s most famous, was written and recorded in under 24 hours for the popular “Pretty in Pink Soundtrack” and was featured prominently in the closing scene of the movie.

Director John Hughes was a big fan of the band and had enlisted them to write a song for the closing prom scene, which they did called “Goddess of Love.” But after the original ending of the movie tested poorly (Molly Ringwold’s character Andie ended up with Jon Cryer’s character, Duckie), an alternative ending was written and shot. The new and final ending has Molly choosing well… watch for yourself…

Because of the new ending, Hughes needed OMD to write and record a new song to replace “Goddess of Love,” that would fit with the new ending, instead. OMD obliged with “If You Leave,” written and recorded in under 24 hours.

Though my mom preferred yellow, she was beautiful in every color, loved clothes and being fashionable. I believe she would have appreciated Molly Ringwold’s fashion sense. This song was a defining staple of 80’s music and peaked at #4 in May of 1986 while I was finishing my freshman year at West Mid-High living in Norman, Oklahoma, and my mom was a teacher at a nearby elementary school.

The song itself is a perfect 80’s example of the ending of a chapter and the beginning of a new one. “If You Leave” comes from the perspective of a person who knows that the end of a relationship is near and is asking for just a little more time before the end.

McClusky described the song as “The end of high school… the ending of your childhood,” going on to say that they were trying to capture “this fear of what comes next.” I think what comes through is that teenage angst and urgency that occurs as chapters of lives end and new ones begin. The video sure goes over the top to relay those emotions as well. But some 35+ years after the release of this song, I think you can still listen to it and have similar feelings and urgencies but just maybe from a slightly different older, more mature perspective.

But what comes through as you watch that closing scene and hear this song is the heart-on-sleeve urgency of teen romance and really the urgency of life in general. It’s fleeting so love on your family and your friends with every moment you get.

As always, thanks for reading.

sincerely,

the80’s

RIP to my beautiful mom pictured here with my sister Kari and your author circa 1986-87
The world won’t listen – growing up with Pretty in Pink

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“Dawn is Breaking Everywhere. Light a Candle, Curse the Glare”

Posted on May 29, 2024 by Double K

“Draw the curtains, I don’t care
‘Cause it’s alright” – The Grateful Dead

If you believe in the old adage that a man is the sum of his parts then Bill Walton needed every bit (and then some) of his 6 foot 11 inch frame to hold in the mighty sum he was made of for the 71 years he walked (occasionally hobbled) along on this spinning rock. I don’t know that there are enough adjectives or descriptions to describe the one-of-a-kind Walton, but by many accounts of people that knew or spent time around Bill, he was warm, witty, loving, intelligent, bizarre, insightful, thankful, purposeful, gracious, athletic, peculiar, radical, philosophical, curious, insert-your-own description.

Though Bill passed away after a battle with cancer this past Memorial Day weekend, there is a kind of poetical symmetry that he was taken from us in the year where his beloved “Conference of Champions” (the Pac 10/Pac 12) also met its’ untimely demise.

The UCLA basketball legend and NBA Hall of Famer kept a quote on his desk or in his office from his UCLA basketball coach, the late, great John Wooden that read: “To Bill Walton, it’s the things you learn after you know it all that count.” Such a true statement, and one I’m sure which helped spur Bill’s lifelong pursuit of whatever fancied his mind at any given time.

“I don’t sleep much. I’m on the go. My mind is racing. My wife says my mind is like the rolling dials on a slot machine. So, yeah, I think about everything.”

I’ve always thought to let a man speak for himself if he has something to say, and boy did Bill have things to say. For those that enjoyed the boyish enthusiasm, the comical comparisons, and sometimes just bizarre thoughts, comments, and actions then please enjoy the following quotes from Bill, because nothing explains Bill Walton any better than Bill Walton, himself:

“I was a skinny, scrawny guy. I stuttered horrendously, couldn’t speak at all. I was a very shy, reserved player and a very shy, reserved person. I found a safe place in life in basketball.”

“I grew up in a non-athletic family, where my parents were interested in music, in literature, in education and art.”

“Growing up, my parents were very, very strict. And then I went to UCLA with John Wooden, who was just off the charts.”

“I mean, I’m 6-foot-11, I’ve got red hair, freckles, I’m a goofy, nerdy-looking guy, I’ve got a speech impediment-I stutter and stammer all the time-and I’m a Deadhead.”

“Basketball is one of those rare opportunities where you can make a difference, not only for yourself, but for other people as well.”

“Never rank, rate, or compare coaches, children, concerts, or championships or congratulations. Just enjoy them all.”

“He (John Wooden) told us that he had made a mistake by leaving the word love out of the Pyramid of Success. And that love is the single most powerful and important word in our language and culture. And until we allow the power of love to supersede the love of power, none of us has any chance of success at all.”

Bill’s commentary on various NBA players:

“Bill Russell was my favorite player of all-time.”

“If Eric Piatkowski continues playing at this level, he’s going to replace Jerry West on the NBA logo.”

“John Stockton is one of the true marvels, not just of basketball, or in America, but in the history of Western Civilization!”

“Anytime you bring Michael Olowokandi on to your team, disaster is soon to follow.”

 “Greg Ostertag is one of the top centers on this planet!”

“When I think of Boris Diaw, I think of Beethoven in the age of the romantics.”

“Why is Scottie Pippen taking a charge? Taking a charge is for people with no game!”

“Doug Christie, what skill, what strength, what power, what quickness. The vision of Magic Johnson, the athleticism of Michael Jordan, the toughness of Larry Bird. Doug Christie has it all.”

“Steve Nash is the most un-athletic player in the league.”

“The only man who can stop Cliff Robinson is Cliff Robinson. The man is unstoppable even at 38.“

“Tracy McGrady is doing things we’ve never seen from anybody – from any planet!”

“If Anthony Johnson ever gets a jumper, who’s going to stop him?”

Bill on his multiple surgeries:

“I learned a long time ago that minor surgery is when they do operation on someone else, not you.”

“Health is the most critical thing in our life. With your health anything is possible. Without it, you can’t do anything.”

“I’ve had 36 orthopedic operations, have two fused ankles, my knees, hands and wrists don’t work, I now have a fused spine, other than that, everything is great.”

Various other Bill quotes:

“Mick Jagger is in better shape than far too many NBA players. It’s up in the air whether the same can be said of Keith Richards.”

“When you find yourself talking about less and less and forgetting the love that you bring, never forget there are things you can replace but others you can not.”

“When you intercept the ball with your stomach, that is great defense.”

“I couldn’t imagine not playing basketball. To me, basketball is what life is all about.”

“A lot of people understand what not saying anything means, so, in effect, not saying anything is really saying a lot.”

“If you’re living for today, if you’re only dreaming about yesterday, it doesn’t work. You got to know that tomorrow is going to be better. Then you’re on your way.”

“Oh well, a touch of grey, kinda suits you anyway. That was all I had to say, and it’s alright.”

It’s a long recognized fact that Bill Walton may have been The Grateful Dead’s biggest fan (quite literally as well standing at 6 feet 11 inches and having attended somewhere in the neighborhood of 800-1000 Grateful Dead concerts).

“The Grateful Dead, they’re my best friends. Their message of hope, peace, love, teamwork, creativity, imagination, celebration, the dance, the vision, the purpose, the passion all of the things I believe in makes me the luckiest Deadhead in the world.”

In 1987 I was going into my junior year of high school when The Grateful Dead released the song and video for “Touch of Grey,” which became the only Grateful Dead song I could name if I was ever prompted to name one of their songs. I never was put on the spot, probably because I didn’t grow up in the right time period and just didn’t have any friends in high school who were “Deadheads.” But I did (and still do) enjoy this particular song which came a little over a year after Bill Walton had won the 6th Man of the Year award in the NBA and had helped lead my favorite NBA team of all time, the 1985-86 Boston Celtics to a NBA championship. While on air many years later, commentator Dave Pasch speaking about Bill’s days as a Celtic reminded Bill “You did win Sixth Man of the Year,” to which Walton replied: “Which means I was Larry Bird’s valet. Which means my job was to tell Larry what time the game started.“

Danny Ainge, Bill Walton, and Larry Bird

Back to the song and video, which I also kind of enjoyed. It features the band as performing skeletons and almost immediately reminded me of an episode of my favorite short-lived TV sitcom from 1984-85 called “It’s Your Move” starring a 15 year old Jason Bateman (Matthew) and his neighbor and antagonist David Garrison (Norman) of “Married With Children” fame. The two-part episode was about a fictitious band created by Matthew named The Dregs of Humanity. The band is portrayed with skeletons hidden under clothing. Anyway, you can still watch the entire two-part show on Youtube should you be so inclined. But I digress.

The fact that drummer Mickey Hart happens to be wearing a Boston Celtics jacket in the video didn’t hurt my admiration, and it also coincided with Bill’s current landscape in 1987 which happened to be the final stop in his injury-plagued NBA journey when he officially retired in 1990.

“Music is critical in our lives and culture. It’s the inspiration that drives us. It’s also the window to our souls. It’s a reflection as to who we are, what we stand for, and where we’re going.” – Bill Walton

The window to our souls. A reflection of who we are, what we stand for, and where we’re going. Written by Robert Hunter and composed by Jerry Garcia, here is the video for “Touch of Grey”

We will get by. We will survive.

Rest easy, Big Red

sincerely,

the80’s

For an outstanding piece written by Bill’s colleague and friend at ESPN, “Jake” Bilas, here is the link to his wonderful tribute.

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“When There’s Nothing to Lose and There’s Nothing to Prove”

Posted on May 23, 2024 by Double K

“Well, I’m dancing with myself, ah, oh, oh-oh” – Billy Idol

Billy Idol is 68. There is nothing to prove anymore to anyone except maybe to himself. For his fans, he is past that unknowable, invisible, life mile-marker that we typically create within our minds in the later stages of our careers or lives. It’s a particularly notable thing bestowed upon our famous athletes, actors, musicians, etc. “They have nothing left to prove!” But in reality, are any of us really ever past the point of “nothing to prove,” because if we are then what’s the point? Isn’t it our humanly innate desires and ambitions that continue to drive us to try new things or take on new challenges with something to prove even if it’s just to use the tired and worn phrase of “been there, done that”?

Aren’t the best athletes, musicians, students, employees ones that still carry that proverbial chip on their shoulder? Those that still want to prove something. Why would I be still posting a bunch of words on this site? Why would older adults go back to school or people leave nice jobs to start a new business? Why would 68 year old rockers still kick out new music? What am I still trying to prove? What are you still trying to prove? Whatever your answer or motivation for doing so may be, just keep going.

My friend Chris and I attended Billy’s concert in Tulsa last week where the half-Irish grandfather blitzed through 14 songs in just under 90 minutes. Despite his age and a troublesome foot, Billy Idol was still Billy Idol – the fist pumps, the snarl, the leather, and the “f-you” punk attitude that has served him well taking him out of England and turning him into an American rock superstar over 40 years ago.

We sat on the fourth row. Yes, it was a premium price for a premium artist past his prime, but like Chris and I realized – we’re not paying 2024 ticket prices in hopes of seeing 1984 Billy Idol. We’re paying premium ticket prices in 2024 because we couldn’t afford them back in 1984 when we were young and broke. Now, it’s more as a way to thank he and Steve for their many years of service and their many years of outstanding music.

You have nothing left to prove, Billy, but I and your legions of fans sure don’t mind if you keep trying.

Billy
Longtime guitarist, the great Steve Stevens

If you believe the all-knowing, Wikipedia, the name “Billy Idol” was inspired by a schoolteacher’s description of him as “idle.” Maybe that describes his lack of willingness or care about his Chemistry class all those years ago, but it certainly does not describe his life as a performer, because Billy has been out to prove he is more “idol” than “idle” continuing to tour and continuing to put out solid music. Over the past 10 years, see: “Bitter Pill,” “Bitter Taste,” “Cage,” “Save Me Now,” and “Running From the Ghost,” for just a few of his better songs over that timespan.

In 2020 I posted a Billy Idol song during one of the worst times in our world history – the COVID pandemic, and I’ve always felt a little bad about that, because I somehow feel in my head I tainted Billy’s image a little. Of course if any rock star is tough enough to take it, it’s Billy, a man who has survived drug overdoses and motorcycle crashes. Now that we’re a few years removed from those horrible pandemic days, I’m circling back to Billy Idol because of my first time seeing him in concert.

“So let’s sink another drink
And it’ll give me time to think”

Today’s song has long been my favorite Billy Idol song, and music video of his for that matter. The song was originally written by Billy and his bandmate, bassist Tony James, for their group Gen X. It was released on their 1981 album “Kiss Me Deadly” to very little fanfare in the UK peaking at just #62. The inspiration for the song came along somewhere during a late 70’s Gen X tour where Billy and his mates were struck by the sight of the young crowd in a Tokyo discotheque dancing with their own reflections in mirrored walls rather than with one another. Idol added that “the song is really about people being in a disenfranchised world where they’re left bereft dancing with their own reflections.”

After Billy left the band and headed to the States for his solo career, he remixed it and re-released it later the same year and it became Billy’s first hit peaking at #27 on the U.S. dance charts. Still too low in my opinion, but the video for the song was in heavy rotation by the time it was released in 1983 shortly after the launch of a brand new television station called MTV. And why wouldn’t it be? The video was directed by British horror filmmaker Tobe Hopper and features Billy on top of a skyscraper fighting off dancing 80’s zombies. Yes, please!

His autobiography of the same name (which I haven’t read yet) was published in 2014. So, once again, a toast to you, Billy Idol, and to your legendary collaborator and lead guitarist, the Grammy award-winning Steve Stevens, and a toast to the long career you’ve built and may you continue to prove something to yourself and may you continue touring and opening up with your classic and my favorite, “Dancing With Myself…”

“Sweat, sweat, sweat, ow!”

sincerely,

the80’s

Added bonus: Here is the opening 3:46 of his concert in Tulsa at the Hardrock Casino and Hotel from my seat just four rows deep last week in case you haven’t seen or heard Billy in about 20, 30, 40 years…

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“I Remember Rich Girl in the Summer Like Yesterday”

Posted on March 27, 2024 by Double K

“Philly, forget me not, forget me not, forget me not” – Daryl Hall & John Oates

Today’s song choice seemed oh so phitting, because Philly I will not forget you no matter how much I’d like to.

More specifically, Philly airport, I will forget you not. I will not forget the three hour delay that began in Raleigh, North Carolina that led to me sprinting down two of your Philly terminals only to miss my 10:35 pm international connecting flight by just minutes. No Philly, I won’t forget losing my phone in the airport amidst the chaos, confusion, and my distractedness of nearly collapsing from a case of asthma induced physical exertion apparently referred to as “exercise-induced bronchoconstriction (EIB)” (self-diagnosis). Sorry Philly, my lack of poor physical conditioning is not a direct reflection on you though in my current state of mental and physical exhaustion, yeah screw it, that’s your fault too.

“Oh and when the hands hit eleven
Pennsylvania came to life”

I won’t forget finding an officer who used his phone to call the airport Marriott at well past 11 (closer to midnight) to see if they had any availability. Thankfully the Marriott had a room, which I of course paid nearly $300 for a sleepless night of anxiety, frustration, and coughing (apparently EIB can linger for hours afterwards). There’s a bill to reimburse coming your way, American Airlines, and a reckoning for your delayed flight which resulted in one less less vacation day for me in Amsterdam. You owe me.

But Philly, I also won’t forget my biggest hero – Paula, supervisor of the American Airlines baggage claim office who personally tracked down my lost iPhone after five hours spent the next morning of “we can’t find it.” Thankfully I had my MacBook Air so I was able to show her that it was still in Terminal A with the help of the find my iPhone app. When she personally went to Terminal A and found it shortly after 1 pm, it had apparently not been placed in the “correct” lost and found lock box. “You got lucky,” she said. Yes I did. Lucky for connecting with you. Thank God for Philly Paula, my phucking hero. An A plus for you Paula. A big, fat F minus for you American Airlines for not one, but two different flight delays so far. We’ll see how it goes over the next several days. Maybe you can get your grade up to a D or maybe I’ll just never fly American Airlines again.

Nope, Philly, can’t, won’t forget you. Now, for the love of God, Philly – get me out of here.

“Philly, I would never change on ya
You ain’t always sunny, honey
But you love me back”

I’m staring out a Philly airport window as I write this, and yep you guessed it – cloudy and rainy. One thing I do actually love is Philly’s own Hall & Oates having seen them in concert in Tulsa in 2017. They actually released this pleasant single, performed with the band Train, in 2018.

It hit #12 on the AC charts. Here is Daryl Hall & John Oates alongside Train’s Patrick Monahan with a live version of “Philly, Forget Me Not”

Thanks for reading my rant, and may any of your upcoming air travels be much smoother.

sincerely,

the80s

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